1 00:00:01,625 --> 00:00:04,458 (Multicom Jingle) 2 00:00:13,103 --> 00:00:16,686 (ominous orchestral music) 3 00:00:39,394 --> 00:00:42,561 (electricity zapping) 4 00:00:45,526 --> 00:00:47,502 - [Emmett] What the hell is that light comin' from, Roy? 5 00:00:47,502 --> 00:00:49,362 - [Roy] I don't know. 6 00:00:49,362 --> 00:00:50,364 It's right down there. 7 00:00:50,364 --> 00:00:51,197 - [Emmett] Where? 8 00:00:51,197 --> 00:00:52,030 - [Roy] Come on. 9 00:00:52,030 --> 00:00:52,863 - [Emmett] Come on, where? 10 00:00:52,863 --> 00:00:53,696 - [Roy] Let's follow it. 11 00:00:53,696 --> 00:00:55,183 - [Emmett] I'm followin', I'm followin'. 12 00:00:55,183 --> 00:00:56,016 - [Roy] Over there. 13 00:00:56,016 --> 00:00:56,854 It's right on top of us, Emmett. 14 00:00:56,854 --> 00:00:58,884 - [Emmett] Is that a helicopter or what? 15 00:00:58,884 --> 00:01:00,197 Wait a minute. - [Roy] What? 16 00:01:00,197 --> 00:01:01,273 Oh, it's too damn bright. 17 00:01:01,273 --> 00:01:03,693 - [Both] I can't see. 18 00:01:03,693 --> 00:01:05,776 - [Emmett] Wait a minute. 19 00:01:06,768 --> 00:01:07,757 (aircraft whooshes) 20 00:01:07,757 --> 00:01:08,861 (men chattering) 21 00:01:08,861 --> 00:01:09,780 - [Roy] Go, go, go! 22 00:01:09,780 --> 00:01:10,613 Now! 23 00:01:10,613 --> 00:01:11,446 - [Emmet] I'm goin', I'm tryin'. 24 00:01:11,446 --> 00:01:12,279 I'm doin' the best I can. 25 00:01:12,279 --> 00:01:13,112 - [Roy] Faster. 26 00:01:13,112 --> 00:01:13,945 Don't lose it. 27 00:01:13,945 --> 00:01:14,966 - [Emmett] Pick up on this damn thing. 28 00:01:14,966 --> 00:01:15,799 Where the hell did they go? 29 00:01:15,799 --> 00:01:17,707 - It's the goddamn Russians, I tell you. 30 00:01:17,707 --> 00:01:20,050 - [Emmett] No, it's gotta be from another planet. 31 00:01:20,050 --> 00:01:22,010 - It's a goddamn squadron of Sputniks 32 00:01:22,010 --> 00:01:23,860 comin' down to put fluoride in the water. 33 00:01:23,860 --> 00:01:24,693 - [Emmett] Where'd they go? 34 00:01:24,693 --> 00:01:28,994 (dramatic orchestral music) 35 00:01:28,994 --> 00:01:30,882 What the hell was that? 36 00:01:30,882 --> 00:01:32,522 (electricity zapping) 37 00:01:32,522 --> 00:01:33,588 (men grunting) 38 00:01:33,588 --> 00:01:35,140 Son of a bitch! 39 00:01:35,140 --> 00:01:38,557 (electricity screeching) 40 00:01:40,465 --> 00:01:42,631 (dramatic music) 41 00:01:42,631 --> 00:01:45,876 (electricity zaps) 42 00:01:45,876 --> 00:01:47,220 - What is this, art? 43 00:01:47,220 --> 00:01:48,510 Weren't there any victims? 44 00:01:48,510 --> 00:01:50,630 - You're looking at the victims, Cobb, for Christ's sake. 45 00:01:50,630 --> 00:01:53,210 These people lost their houses. 46 00:01:53,210 --> 00:01:54,590 - Anybody burned? 47 00:01:54,590 --> 00:01:55,480 Third degree? 48 00:01:55,480 --> 00:01:57,010 Second degree? 49 00:01:57,010 --> 00:01:58,360 First? 50 00:01:58,360 --> 00:02:00,250 - No, they're all fine. 51 00:02:00,250 --> 00:02:01,660 - I can't use this shit. 52 00:02:01,660 --> 00:02:04,140 I need people diving from billowing windows. 53 00:02:04,140 --> 00:02:06,947 Captured frozen mid-plummet. 54 00:02:06,947 --> 00:02:09,850 You know, grasping, clutching at the air, 55 00:02:09,850 --> 00:02:11,550 that look in their eyes. 56 00:02:11,550 --> 00:02:12,760 I need a little drama. 57 00:02:12,760 --> 00:02:15,680 - You told me to shoot the fire, I shot the fire. 58 00:02:15,680 --> 00:02:18,430 - No, I told a Pulitzer Prize winning photographer 59 00:02:18,430 --> 00:02:19,550 to shoot the fire. 60 00:02:19,550 --> 00:02:22,370 That's what you were famous for, drama. 61 00:02:22,370 --> 00:02:24,270 Or maybe you just got lucky with that one shot 62 00:02:24,270 --> 00:02:25,920 back when you were in your prime. 63 00:02:26,760 --> 00:02:29,250 - There was nothing lucky about that shot. 64 00:02:29,250 --> 00:02:31,500 - Well, maybe you just don't have it anymore. 65 00:02:33,470 --> 00:02:34,303 - Maybe. 66 00:02:35,180 --> 00:02:39,163 - Big shot prizewinning photojournalist loses nerve. 67 00:02:40,330 --> 00:02:41,180 - I'm outta here. 68 00:02:44,700 --> 00:02:46,930 - Maybe you just feel guilty about taking that shot 69 00:02:46,930 --> 00:02:48,630 instead of being a hero back then. 70 00:02:51,625 --> 00:02:53,950 (Delbert exhales) 71 00:02:53,950 --> 00:02:56,723 Guilt written all over your face. 72 00:02:57,944 --> 00:03:00,861 (truck sputtering) 73 00:03:07,012 --> 00:03:09,180 (engine turning over) 74 00:03:09,180 --> 00:03:10,013 - Gah! 75 00:03:12,034 --> 00:03:15,201 (engine turning over) 76 00:03:17,277 --> 00:03:19,944 (fists banging) 77 00:03:27,482 --> 00:03:30,982 (boot thuds against tire) 78 00:03:36,370 --> 00:03:37,520 It's quite a selection. 79 00:03:39,440 --> 00:03:40,950 Uh, my battery went dead. 80 00:03:40,950 --> 00:03:42,069 I wonder if I-- 81 00:03:42,069 --> 00:03:44,773 - Do you know the difference between art and porno? 82 00:03:46,700 --> 00:03:47,533 - I think so. 83 00:03:48,730 --> 00:03:49,563 - Pubic hair. 84 00:03:50,470 --> 00:03:53,833 This is art, and this is porno. 85 00:03:57,300 --> 00:03:58,540 - Penthouse? 86 00:03:58,540 --> 00:04:01,670 - They started it all in 1969. 87 00:04:01,670 --> 00:04:03,803 Bang, pubic hair all over. 88 00:04:05,281 --> 00:04:06,681 That's what I call progress. 89 00:04:09,290 --> 00:04:10,123 - I see. 90 00:04:11,280 --> 00:04:12,430 Could I use your phone? 91 00:04:14,226 --> 00:04:15,526 - You gonna buy somethin'? 92 00:04:17,810 --> 00:04:19,103 - Yeah, sure. 93 00:04:22,310 --> 00:04:23,560 How much for the Brownie? 94 00:04:24,400 --> 00:04:26,650 - Oh, that's an antique. 95 00:04:26,650 --> 00:04:28,650 One man's junk's another man's treasure. 96 00:04:30,220 --> 00:04:34,244 I'll let ya have it for 50. 97 00:04:34,244 --> 00:04:35,077 - What? 98 00:04:35,077 --> 00:04:35,910 - [Man On Porch] Okay, 25 then. 99 00:04:35,910 --> 00:04:36,743 - You gotta be kidding. 100 00:04:36,743 --> 00:04:38,880 - All right, 15 cents, take it or leave it. 101 00:04:41,287 --> 00:04:44,340 - Oh yeah, sounds fair. 102 00:04:44,340 --> 00:04:45,240 Where's the phone? 103 00:04:46,390 --> 00:04:49,551 - It's right inside if it's still connected. 104 00:04:49,551 --> 00:04:50,770 (coins clanking) 105 00:04:50,770 --> 00:04:52,142 - Thanks. 106 00:04:52,142 --> 00:04:54,473 (dog barking) 107 00:04:54,473 --> 00:04:55,306 Well, let's see. 108 00:04:55,306 --> 00:04:56,540 I think I'll put that there. 109 00:04:58,796 --> 00:04:59,886 No, no, no. 110 00:04:59,886 --> 00:05:02,113 I'll put that there. 111 00:05:03,684 --> 00:05:05,514 Oh yeah, that's what I'll do. 112 00:05:05,514 --> 00:05:06,681 I'll put that, 113 00:05:10,233 --> 00:05:11,066 whoa! 114 00:05:11,066 --> 00:05:13,899 (camera clatters) 115 00:05:16,275 --> 00:05:19,275 (suspenseful music) 116 00:05:28,681 --> 00:05:31,105 What is this, art? 117 00:05:31,105 --> 00:05:33,128 (scoffs) 118 00:05:33,128 --> 00:05:36,461 (soft orchestral music) 119 00:05:56,859 --> 00:05:58,776 Well, this is exciting. 120 00:06:01,046 --> 00:06:02,677 Great, 121 00:06:02,677 --> 00:06:03,873 an NRA poster. 122 00:06:08,321 --> 00:06:12,238 (suspenseful orchestral music) 123 00:06:17,076 --> 00:06:18,640 What the hell? 124 00:06:18,640 --> 00:06:19,540 - Let me see that. 125 00:06:21,290 --> 00:06:23,440 Okay, what've we got here? 126 00:06:23,440 --> 00:06:25,020 What's this, art? 127 00:06:25,020 --> 00:06:26,700 - Uh, keep going. 128 00:06:26,700 --> 00:06:28,340 - I was an art major with a minor 129 00:06:28,340 --> 00:06:31,450 in nuclear destruction. (chuckles) 130 00:06:31,450 --> 00:06:34,980 Yeah, I'm a people person myself. 131 00:06:34,980 --> 00:06:37,130 I'm very people oriented, that's why they put me 132 00:06:37,130 --> 00:06:39,620 here in the office of information. 133 00:06:39,620 --> 00:06:40,453 You're lucky. 134 00:06:40,453 --> 00:06:43,290 You found me in a rare moment of inactivity, 135 00:06:43,290 --> 00:06:44,123 let me tell you. 136 00:06:44,123 --> 00:06:46,560 How the hell did you find me? 137 00:06:46,560 --> 00:06:47,710 - Uh, it wasn't easy. 138 00:06:47,710 --> 00:06:49,413 I kept getting the runaround. 139 00:06:50,520 --> 00:06:51,657 - Yeah, I bet you did. 140 00:06:52,610 --> 00:06:53,820 Oh, look at that. 141 00:06:53,820 --> 00:06:54,653 She pretty. 142 00:06:56,060 --> 00:06:57,940 That your little girl? 143 00:06:57,940 --> 00:07:00,142 - No, I have no idea who she is. 144 00:07:00,142 --> 00:07:03,142 (airplane rumbling) 145 00:07:06,313 --> 00:07:10,280 - Oh boy, look what we have here. 146 00:07:10,280 --> 00:07:11,443 Look at this. 147 00:07:12,570 --> 00:07:15,070 Now, that is a truck, ha! 148 00:07:15,070 --> 00:07:16,040 That is a truck. 149 00:07:16,040 --> 00:07:18,563 T-R-U-K, truck! 150 00:07:19,710 --> 00:07:23,470 1958 Studebaker, my boy. 151 00:07:23,470 --> 00:07:26,030 They don't make 'em like that anymore, you know. 152 00:07:26,030 --> 00:07:29,220 Listen, I'm gonna be going to lunch soon 153 00:07:29,220 --> 00:07:30,310 down in the officers' mess. 154 00:07:30,310 --> 00:07:33,160 You wanna join me, 'cause they're gonna make sloppy joes? 155 00:07:34,940 --> 00:07:36,450 - Uh, no, thank you. 156 00:07:36,450 --> 00:07:39,093 You know, if you look at the next picture 157 00:07:39,093 --> 00:07:42,023 you can see, I think, why I brought these to you. 158 00:07:43,080 --> 00:07:44,390 - Wow. 159 00:07:44,390 --> 00:07:45,223 Ha! 160 00:07:46,090 --> 00:07:49,380 Now that's a great flyin' saucer. 161 00:07:49,380 --> 00:07:52,680 They don't have 'em like that anymore either, I tell you. 162 00:07:52,680 --> 00:07:54,080 - No, I guess not. 163 00:07:54,080 --> 00:07:54,913 - Yeah. 164 00:07:55,870 --> 00:07:57,750 Oh, look at this. 165 00:07:57,750 --> 00:07:59,320 Aliens. 166 00:07:59,320 --> 00:08:00,704 Ha! 167 00:08:00,704 --> 00:08:03,758 Aliens, yeah. 168 00:08:03,758 --> 00:08:05,413 Boy, these are classic. 169 00:08:06,250 --> 00:08:08,833 I wish they still made 'em like this, you know dat? 170 00:08:08,833 --> 00:08:10,700 I don't like the way they make 'em today. 171 00:08:10,700 --> 00:08:14,360 They make 'em all spiky and they got mean faces 172 00:08:14,360 --> 00:08:15,760 and things like that. 173 00:08:15,760 --> 00:08:17,680 I like the ones that Spielberg made. 174 00:08:17,680 --> 00:08:19,090 They's kinda romantic. 175 00:08:19,090 --> 00:08:21,990 They's cuddly and they's soft 176 00:08:21,990 --> 00:08:25,700 and they're round like Gumby 177 00:08:25,700 --> 00:08:27,637 screwed a hard-boiled egg, you know. 178 00:08:27,637 --> 00:08:30,490 (laughs) 179 00:08:30,490 --> 00:08:31,973 What the hell is that? 180 00:08:32,982 --> 00:08:35,900 - If ya turn that around, I think it's upside down, 181 00:08:35,900 --> 00:08:37,980 if ya turn that around, you'll see that it looks like 182 00:08:37,980 --> 00:08:41,320 the aliens are abducting the men. 183 00:08:41,320 --> 00:08:44,580 - Boy, it is some job, I wanna tell ya. 184 00:08:44,580 --> 00:08:47,729 These things, the aliens, they look, 185 00:08:47,729 --> 00:08:49,297 they look better in close up. 186 00:08:49,297 --> 00:08:50,350 What'd ya do? 187 00:08:50,350 --> 00:08:52,100 What'd ya made 'em out of? 188 00:08:52,100 --> 00:08:55,220 Latex and papier mache? 189 00:08:55,220 --> 00:08:56,380 - I didn't make them. 190 00:08:56,380 --> 00:08:58,223 Like I said, I just found a camera, 191 00:08:59,290 --> 00:09:02,010 it had film in it, and I developed it. 192 00:09:02,010 --> 00:09:02,883 That's it. 193 00:09:06,740 --> 00:09:07,843 - You found a camera. 194 00:09:11,660 --> 00:09:12,537 Uh-huh. 195 00:09:16,060 --> 00:09:18,393 Well now, tell me, 196 00:09:21,270 --> 00:09:25,320 where exactly did you find this camera? 197 00:09:25,320 --> 00:09:27,360 - At a garage sale in Bakersfield. 198 00:09:27,360 --> 00:09:29,030 Look, you tell me. 199 00:09:29,030 --> 00:09:30,660 You guys are the experts in this stuff. 200 00:09:30,660 --> 00:09:31,493 You tell me. 201 00:09:31,493 --> 00:09:36,173 Is that photographic evidence of a UFO abduction or not? 202 00:09:37,210 --> 00:09:38,093 - I don't know. 203 00:09:40,160 --> 00:09:42,770 You know what you can do, you can go 204 00:09:42,770 --> 00:09:45,670 to one of these flying saucer magazines. 205 00:09:45,670 --> 00:09:48,453 They pay a lot of money for a thing like this. 206 00:09:49,390 --> 00:09:51,400 - What do you mean a thing like this? 207 00:09:51,400 --> 00:09:52,940 Don't you wanna investigate this? 208 00:09:52,940 --> 00:09:54,190 Find out what's going on? 209 00:09:55,210 --> 00:09:56,620 Analyze it? 210 00:09:56,620 --> 00:09:57,510 - Analyze it? 211 00:09:57,510 --> 00:09:59,130 Do you know how much the Air Force 212 00:09:59,130 --> 00:10:01,980 has spent analyzing things? 213 00:10:01,980 --> 00:10:03,563 What about the young officers? 214 00:10:04,410 --> 00:10:05,800 They don't know what to do because of 215 00:10:05,800 --> 00:10:07,970 their inexperience and their youth. 216 00:10:07,970 --> 00:10:08,803 So what do they do? 217 00:10:08,803 --> 00:10:11,870 They fall prey to a false conclusion 218 00:10:11,870 --> 00:10:15,740 and then we have to reconclude them. 219 00:10:15,740 --> 00:10:17,540 But they ain't enough for you guys. 220 00:10:17,540 --> 00:10:18,850 Oh, no, no, no. 221 00:10:18,850 --> 00:10:20,480 You gotta know everything, everything. 222 00:10:20,480 --> 00:10:23,890 What the MJ-12 project is, what's in Hangar 18, 223 00:10:23,890 --> 00:10:25,630 what's in Area 51? 224 00:10:25,630 --> 00:10:29,030 You gotta know all that, all that, you nosy people. 225 00:10:29,030 --> 00:10:31,148 You wanna know the skinny, gimme the skinny. 226 00:10:31,148 --> 00:10:32,926 I'll give you the skinny, my friend. 227 00:10:32,926 --> 00:10:37,338 (airplane roaring drowns out dialogue) 228 00:10:37,338 --> 00:10:38,171 Do you understand that? 229 00:10:38,171 --> 00:10:40,240 We aren't gonna spend anymore money 230 00:10:40,240 --> 00:10:43,680 investigatin' stuff like this. 231 00:10:43,680 --> 00:10:45,331 No more. 232 00:10:45,331 --> 00:10:48,277 No more. 233 00:10:48,277 --> 00:10:49,673 And do you know why? 234 00:10:50,700 --> 00:10:53,570 Because of itty, bitsy, 235 00:10:53,570 --> 00:10:55,650 piggly, wiggly 236 00:10:55,650 --> 00:10:58,373 people like you. 237 00:11:02,140 --> 00:11:04,663 - So, you still living in Barstow? 238 00:11:05,680 --> 00:11:07,520 - No, Bakersfield. 239 00:11:07,520 --> 00:11:08,540 - Oh yeah, Bakersfield. 240 00:11:08,540 --> 00:11:09,767 And you're, uh-- 241 00:11:10,870 --> 00:11:11,703 - Freelancing. 242 00:11:11,703 --> 00:11:12,620 - Freelancing. 243 00:11:12,620 --> 00:11:13,627 Uh, for-- 244 00:11:16,830 --> 00:11:17,780 - Different people. 245 00:11:18,870 --> 00:11:20,643 - Different people, gotcha. 246 00:11:22,270 --> 00:11:24,000 - You wanna take a look at the next one? 247 00:11:24,000 --> 00:11:25,950 I think it's a little more interesting. 248 00:11:26,930 --> 00:11:28,330 I mean, who is this fella for instance? 249 00:11:28,330 --> 00:11:29,410 What's his story? 250 00:11:29,410 --> 00:11:30,780 Did you know the Air Force shut down 251 00:11:30,780 --> 00:11:32,850 Project Blue Book in 1969? 252 00:11:32,850 --> 00:11:34,100 The only people who investigate 253 00:11:34,100 --> 00:11:37,760 this kinda stuff anymore are UFO freaks. 254 00:11:37,760 --> 00:11:40,260 Maybe somebody oughta check this out or something. 255 00:11:42,900 --> 00:11:43,740 - Why don't you? 256 00:11:43,740 --> 00:11:45,260 - Well, I don't do that kinda stuff. 257 00:11:45,260 --> 00:11:46,860 I just take pictures. 258 00:11:46,860 --> 00:11:49,920 - I thought you said you didn't take these pictures. 259 00:11:49,920 --> 00:11:52,720 - I know, I didn't take these pictures. 260 00:11:52,720 --> 00:11:54,100 - So how much do you want for these pictures 261 00:11:54,100 --> 00:11:54,933 you didn't take? 262 00:11:56,603 --> 00:11:59,130 - I don't know, I didn't think about it. 263 00:11:59,130 --> 00:12:00,180 - We knew each other, what? 264 00:12:00,180 --> 00:12:01,670 10 years ago or something? 265 00:12:01,670 --> 00:12:02,510 - Nine, 10, yeah. 266 00:12:02,510 --> 00:12:03,343 - Uh-huh. 267 00:12:03,343 --> 00:12:05,300 I mean, we were like at the right place at the right time. 268 00:12:05,300 --> 00:12:08,063 You got the shot, I got the story, we got lucky. 269 00:12:09,060 --> 00:12:10,233 - Those people died. 270 00:12:11,609 --> 00:12:13,723 There was not much lucky about that. 271 00:12:14,820 --> 00:12:17,840 - Well, it wasn't our fault. 272 00:12:17,840 --> 00:12:21,203 I mean, there was nothing we could do for insurance reasons. 273 00:12:22,400 --> 00:12:23,910 - We could've tried. 274 00:12:23,910 --> 00:12:25,480 - Got our Pulitzers, didn't we? 275 00:12:25,480 --> 00:12:27,277 Got our 20 minutes. 276 00:12:27,277 --> 00:12:30,070 - Daws, you can skip the preamble, okay? 277 00:12:30,070 --> 00:12:33,550 - Look, all I'm saying is, maybe I've had some good breaks, 278 00:12:33,550 --> 00:12:34,987 maybe you haven't and, 279 00:12:34,987 --> 00:12:37,260 the thing is, we're friends, right? 280 00:12:37,260 --> 00:12:39,640 I mean, if you want me to throw you a bone, just say so. 281 00:12:39,640 --> 00:12:41,293 Don't resort to this bullshit. 282 00:12:43,250 --> 00:12:44,100 - Which bullshit? 283 00:12:47,330 --> 00:12:49,158 - This bullshit? 284 00:12:49,158 --> 00:12:51,730 (laughs) My God, look at these things. 285 00:12:51,730 --> 00:12:54,420 This is so phony it wouldn't make it in a supermarket rag. 286 00:12:54,420 --> 00:12:55,653 Where's your integrity? 287 00:12:57,000 --> 00:12:59,913 - Okay, I can give you $200, that's it. 288 00:13:03,280 --> 00:13:07,350 - Look, you just pretend I didn't come here, all right? 289 00:13:07,350 --> 00:13:09,020 This was my mistake. 290 00:13:09,020 --> 00:13:09,893 - I'm sorry. 291 00:13:11,135 --> 00:13:12,410 $500, okay? 292 00:13:12,410 --> 00:13:13,653 - They're not for sale. 293 00:13:16,310 --> 00:13:17,143 - Mosley. 294 00:13:19,410 --> 00:13:20,981 Everything is for sale. 295 00:13:20,981 --> 00:13:24,231 (knocking at the door. 296 00:13:25,502 --> 00:13:28,940 - Mm, Don Polson, Omni Magazine. 297 00:13:28,940 --> 00:13:30,440 Judith Daws gave me your name. 298 00:13:32,207 --> 00:13:34,124 - Come on. - Thank you. 299 00:13:41,760 --> 00:13:44,143 Oh, this is a classic. 300 00:13:45,650 --> 00:13:48,740 Well now, judging from the underbelly, 301 00:13:48,740 --> 00:13:51,340 the configuration of the landing gear, 302 00:13:51,340 --> 00:13:55,070 it appears to be an upper Sonoran variant 303 00:13:55,070 --> 00:13:57,370 of the Cornell classification. 304 00:13:57,370 --> 00:14:00,230 - The Cornell classification woulda been my first guess. 305 00:14:00,230 --> 00:14:02,080 - You can laugh if you want to, 306 00:14:02,080 --> 00:14:06,143 but there have been an enormous number of UFO sightings. 307 00:14:07,120 --> 00:14:09,610 Now, many of these UFOs have been seen 308 00:14:09,610 --> 00:14:13,350 by reputable people who have no connection, 309 00:14:13,350 --> 00:14:18,010 mm, mm, mm, no connection whatsoever to each other. 310 00:14:18,010 --> 00:14:22,543 And yet, they describe having seen the exact same thing. 311 00:14:23,670 --> 00:14:26,150 Now the known details of these sightings 312 00:14:26,150 --> 00:14:28,920 have been cataloged and categorized 313 00:14:28,920 --> 00:14:31,670 according to the size, the weight, the shape, 314 00:14:31,670 --> 00:14:34,660 the color, the silhouette, the geographical area, 315 00:14:34,660 --> 00:14:37,550 whatever, what have you, all for the sake 316 00:14:37,550 --> 00:14:41,090 of explaining the unexplainable. 317 00:14:41,090 --> 00:14:43,980 - It's sort of a field guide to western UFOs. 318 00:14:43,980 --> 00:14:45,540 - Right. 319 00:14:45,540 --> 00:14:48,910 The Air Force began it with Project Blue Book 320 00:14:48,910 --> 00:14:51,860 but they abandoned that in 1969 321 00:14:51,860 --> 00:14:54,120 and now we're just picking up the pieces 322 00:14:54,120 --> 00:14:55,940 and seeing what's what and trying 323 00:14:55,940 --> 00:14:57,740 to bring things up to date. 324 00:14:57,740 --> 00:15:01,530 We call it Project Open Book. 325 00:15:01,530 --> 00:15:02,363 There you are. 326 00:15:02,363 --> 00:15:03,774 You can keep that if you wish. 327 00:15:03,774 --> 00:15:05,540 They're $3.50 on the newsstands. 328 00:15:05,540 --> 00:15:09,757 Now, this one was very common in the '50s 329 00:15:09,757 --> 00:15:12,930 and the '60s in the Southwest. 330 00:15:12,930 --> 00:15:13,940 - Upper Sonora. 331 00:15:13,940 --> 00:15:14,780 - Right. 332 00:15:14,780 --> 00:15:16,593 Now you're catching on. 333 00:15:18,086 --> 00:15:20,570 Is that the camera there? 334 00:15:20,570 --> 00:15:21,403 - [Delbert] Uh, yes it is. 335 00:15:21,403 --> 00:15:22,660 I found it at a garage sale. 336 00:15:22,660 --> 00:15:24,760 - Oh, you're kidding. 337 00:15:24,760 --> 00:15:27,470 Oh, interesting angle. 338 00:15:27,470 --> 00:15:32,170 Guy buys a camera, looks inside, what does he find? 339 00:15:32,170 --> 00:15:35,510 Well, that could start a real surge in garage sale business. 340 00:15:35,510 --> 00:15:36,540 You never know. 341 00:15:36,540 --> 00:15:40,580 Mm, tell me, where exactly was this yard sale? 342 00:15:40,580 --> 00:15:42,610 - A little place over on Terra Bella. 343 00:15:42,610 --> 00:15:43,690 - Terra Bella. 344 00:15:43,690 --> 00:15:46,713 I'll make sure that gets into the article. 345 00:15:48,420 --> 00:15:52,840 And now if you will be so kind as to sign here, please. 346 00:15:52,840 --> 00:15:54,823 It's a standard release form. 347 00:15:55,840 --> 00:15:58,110 - [Delbert] Hey, I haven't seen one of these in years. 348 00:15:58,110 --> 00:16:00,270 These used to be quite a fad for awhile. 349 00:16:00,270 --> 00:16:01,840 - A very short while. 350 00:16:01,840 --> 00:16:03,053 We got a deal on them. 351 00:16:08,027 --> 00:16:10,250 (Delbert exhales) 352 00:16:10,250 --> 00:16:12,080 Good, good. 353 00:16:12,080 --> 00:16:12,950 Thank you. 354 00:16:12,950 --> 00:16:16,483 And here is your $1000 for the photos. 355 00:16:17,344 --> 00:16:18,330 - 1000? 356 00:16:18,330 --> 00:16:21,060 - Yes, we're very serious about this. 357 00:16:21,060 --> 00:16:21,933 It's important. 358 00:16:23,120 --> 00:16:23,953 - I guess it is. 359 00:16:25,290 --> 00:16:29,330 - Now, one last thing. 360 00:16:29,330 --> 00:16:31,733 Could I get a shot of you with the camera? 361 00:16:32,960 --> 00:16:33,793 - Why? 362 00:16:33,793 --> 00:16:35,210 - Gives a story credibility. 363 00:16:35,210 --> 00:16:37,660 You know, people get to see the real camera 364 00:16:37,660 --> 00:16:39,823 with the real person who found it. 365 00:16:41,850 --> 00:16:43,003 - Sure, okay. 366 00:16:47,090 --> 00:16:51,280 - All right, now, hold the camera a little higher. 367 00:16:51,280 --> 00:16:53,150 Mm-hm, yes, good. 368 00:16:53,150 --> 00:16:56,361 All right, go ahead and point at it. 369 00:16:56,361 --> 00:16:57,411 Oh, that's very good. 370 00:16:57,411 --> 00:16:58,440 (camera clicks) Excellent, yes. 371 00:16:58,440 --> 00:17:00,240 Oh, it's a peach. 372 00:17:00,240 --> 00:17:03,190 All right, say E.T. 373 00:17:03,190 --> 00:17:04,998 (camera clicks) 374 00:17:04,998 --> 00:17:06,024 (cash register beeping) 375 00:17:06,024 --> 00:17:10,357 ("Mexican Radio" by Wall of Voodoo) 376 00:17:26,780 --> 00:17:28,173 - I seen an alien once. 377 00:17:31,760 --> 00:17:33,720 Had sexual intercourse with him. 378 00:17:33,720 --> 00:17:37,640 Technically two, no three, well I forget exactly. 379 00:17:37,640 --> 00:17:39,963 It's a very disorienting experience. 380 00:17:41,010 --> 00:17:43,434 They had peckers on 'em about this big, 381 00:17:43,434 --> 00:17:46,160 about as thick as a big ol' cola bottle. 382 00:17:46,160 --> 00:17:48,140 Those are the general dimensions. 383 00:17:48,140 --> 00:17:50,480 And they were curved, too, like the space-time continuum? 384 00:17:50,480 --> 00:17:51,540 Not like a pig's, though. 385 00:17:51,540 --> 00:17:53,010 They were not curved the way a pig's is. 386 00:17:53,010 --> 00:17:55,070 I know the difference. 387 00:17:55,070 --> 00:17:56,500 And I don't care what people say about it, 388 00:17:56,500 --> 00:17:58,900 they're just jealous because it changed my life. 389 00:18:01,558 --> 00:18:03,660 - What is it, my face? 390 00:18:03,660 --> 00:18:04,930 - I had a article in here, too, once. 391 00:18:04,930 --> 00:18:05,763 You seen it? 392 00:18:05,763 --> 00:18:06,596 You recognize me? 393 00:18:07,960 --> 00:18:09,890 - No, I'm sorry I think I missed that one. 394 00:18:09,890 --> 00:18:11,690 Big article with a big picture, too. 395 00:18:11,690 --> 00:18:13,100 Just like this here. 396 00:18:13,100 --> 00:18:15,520 No, technically I was goin' like this 397 00:18:15,520 --> 00:18:17,020 with a real scared look on my face, 398 00:18:17,020 --> 00:18:19,340 you know, for dramatic effect? 399 00:18:19,340 --> 00:18:20,603 Like that. 400 00:18:20,603 --> 00:18:22,660 You know, that's probably why people don't recognize me, 401 00:18:22,660 --> 00:18:24,196 'cause I was makin' that face, right? 402 00:18:24,196 --> 00:18:25,090 (laughs) 403 00:18:25,090 --> 00:18:26,480 Here, let me give you my card 404 00:18:26,480 --> 00:18:28,150 'cause you know we're gonna need your input 405 00:18:28,150 --> 00:18:32,420 for the UFOs-R-US Network bulletin board. 406 00:18:32,420 --> 00:18:35,110 We have every sighting since 1949 cataloged 407 00:18:35,110 --> 00:18:37,910 and cross indexed in the client server database. 408 00:18:37,910 --> 00:18:40,350 Full access over the internet, America Online, 409 00:18:40,350 --> 00:18:42,670 CompuServe, you name it. 410 00:18:42,670 --> 00:18:43,620 Where is that? 411 00:18:43,620 --> 00:18:46,173 Oh, here. (chuckles) 412 00:18:47,650 --> 00:18:48,923 Could I have your autograph? 413 00:18:51,520 --> 00:18:52,353 Right here. 414 00:18:52,353 --> 00:18:53,270 Just make it out to Joleen. 415 00:18:53,270 --> 00:18:55,130 My name's Joleen like the Dolly Parton song. 416 00:18:55,130 --> 00:18:56,830 You know Dolly wrote that song after me. 417 00:18:56,830 --> 00:18:58,150 She named it right after me. 418 00:18:58,150 --> 00:18:58,983 Are you married? 419 00:18:58,983 --> 00:18:59,910 (dramatic orchestral music) Not that it matters. 420 00:18:59,910 --> 00:19:02,270 I mean, I will do you right here in the parking lot. 421 00:19:02,270 --> 00:19:03,103 I don't care. 422 00:19:03,103 --> 00:19:07,020 (chatter drowned out by music) 423 00:19:09,249 --> 00:19:11,170 (knocking at the window) 424 00:19:11,170 --> 00:19:12,310 - I wanna see Don Polson. 425 00:19:12,310 --> 00:19:13,256 Could you tell him it's-- 426 00:19:13,256 --> 00:19:15,607 (window thuds) 427 00:19:15,607 --> 00:19:16,640 - Hey, take a number, hoss. 428 00:19:16,640 --> 00:19:17,890 We're all waitin' on him. 429 00:19:33,892 --> 00:19:36,660 - Um, you're Mosley, aren't you? 430 00:19:36,660 --> 00:19:37,493 - Excuse me? 431 00:19:38,890 --> 00:19:40,980 - You found the camera with pictures 432 00:19:40,980 --> 00:19:42,763 of the vacationing aliens? 433 00:19:45,765 --> 00:19:47,197 - Oh God, not again. 434 00:19:47,197 --> 00:19:49,593 - And he won a Pulitzer Prize for it. 435 00:19:51,280 --> 00:19:53,830 - No, not for those photos. 436 00:19:53,830 --> 00:19:55,580 - You know, I got abducted last week 437 00:19:55,580 --> 00:19:59,070 and they took me to some crazy martian Club Med. 438 00:19:59,070 --> 00:20:01,730 They didn't allow no cameras, though. 439 00:20:01,730 --> 00:20:03,710 - I've got more than just pictures. 440 00:20:03,710 --> 00:20:07,603 I've got videotape and pressed flowers. 441 00:20:08,740 --> 00:20:12,363 - Please, I need to talk to you about these photographs. 442 00:20:14,070 --> 00:20:16,320 - Look, I don't care if you've seen an alien. 443 00:20:16,320 --> 00:20:18,070 I don't care if you slept with one. 444 00:20:18,070 --> 00:20:20,510 I don't care what an alien's penis looks like. 445 00:20:20,510 --> 00:20:24,230 - They're curved like the space-time continuum. 446 00:20:24,230 --> 00:20:25,890 - Hey, wait a minute. 447 00:20:25,890 --> 00:20:27,820 That is my story. 448 00:20:27,820 --> 00:20:30,296 - Well, I never. 449 00:20:30,296 --> 00:20:34,427 They were very sweet and they looked great in heels. 450 00:20:34,427 --> 00:20:37,340 - Whoa, whoa, whoa, back up there, Norma Jean. 451 00:20:37,340 --> 00:20:39,209 Now you're sayin' that all the space aliens 452 00:20:39,209 --> 00:20:40,903 are drag queens. 453 00:20:42,470 --> 00:20:44,533 - They are superior beings. 454 00:20:46,050 --> 00:20:47,380 - Some like it hot. 455 00:20:47,380 --> 00:20:49,453 It's awful damn hot in a lake of fire. 456 00:20:52,560 --> 00:20:54,183 - Blow it out your ass. 457 00:20:56,100 --> 00:20:59,610 - Marilyn, have you, hey. 458 00:20:59,610 --> 00:21:01,630 We got some more pictures for me? 459 00:21:01,630 --> 00:21:03,600 - Yeah, I got somethin' for ya. 460 00:21:03,600 --> 00:21:05,240 - Wait, I-- 461 00:21:05,240 --> 00:21:07,550 - You actually mean to tell me that you drove 462 00:21:07,550 --> 00:21:10,873 all the way down here just to, mm, just to, mm, mm, 463 00:21:11,980 --> 00:21:14,176 just to say shame on you? 464 00:21:14,176 --> 00:21:15,350 (laughs) 465 00:21:15,350 --> 00:21:17,880 - No, I came down here to kick your ass. 466 00:21:17,880 --> 00:21:19,650 - Is that so? 467 00:21:19,650 --> 00:21:21,570 - I want ya to understand something. 468 00:21:21,570 --> 00:21:23,740 - Look, why don't you just use a phone, huh? 469 00:21:23,740 --> 00:21:25,810 Just call me a shithead and hang up. 470 00:21:25,810 --> 00:21:27,010 I get that every day. 471 00:21:27,010 --> 00:21:28,080 No big whoop. 472 00:21:28,080 --> 00:21:30,010 - No, I wanna do this face to face. 473 00:21:30,010 --> 00:21:32,470 - Do what, kick my (coughs) kick (coughs) 474 00:21:32,470 --> 00:21:34,773 kick my (coughs) kick my butt? 475 00:21:35,980 --> 00:21:37,060 - No. 476 00:21:37,060 --> 00:21:39,860 I want ya to understand that ya did something wrong. 477 00:21:39,860 --> 00:21:41,220 - Like what? 478 00:21:41,220 --> 00:21:42,570 - Ya lied. 479 00:21:42,570 --> 00:21:44,410 - Hey, I'm a journalist. 480 00:21:44,410 --> 00:21:45,480 We get to do that. 481 00:21:45,480 --> 00:21:46,605 That's my constitutional right. 482 00:21:46,605 --> 00:21:47,490 (fist bangs) 483 00:21:47,490 --> 00:21:48,860 - You're not a journalist. 484 00:21:48,860 --> 00:21:51,193 You're a congenital liar who can type. 485 00:21:52,260 --> 00:21:53,950 - You leave my genitals out of this. 486 00:21:53,950 --> 00:21:55,490 This is a family rag, pal. 487 00:21:55,490 --> 00:21:59,770 - Your lies by implication have made me a liar. 488 00:21:59,770 --> 00:22:00,603 - So? 489 00:22:02,490 --> 00:22:05,070 - Look, I don't own my own home. 490 00:22:05,070 --> 00:22:06,890 I don't have a new car. 491 00:22:06,890 --> 00:22:08,610 I haven't been to the dentist in two years. 492 00:22:08,610 --> 00:22:10,340 I don't have any of these things 493 00:22:10,340 --> 00:22:12,550 which we use to measure our worth as human beings. 494 00:22:12,550 --> 00:22:16,240 All I have is my name, my integrity and my reputation! 495 00:22:16,240 --> 00:22:19,030 - And your Pulitzer Prize if ya haven't milked that 496 00:22:19,030 --> 00:22:20,693 for all it's worth by now. 497 00:22:24,370 --> 00:22:27,660 - The only reason I don't kick your ass all over this desk 498 00:22:28,600 --> 00:22:30,400 is because I don't wanna go to jail. 499 00:22:31,920 --> 00:22:32,770 - Hey. 500 00:22:32,770 --> 00:22:33,930 Hey, hey, hey! 501 00:22:33,930 --> 00:22:35,340 You know somethin', pal? 502 00:22:35,340 --> 00:22:38,190 Everybody knows that if you hadn't been so busy 503 00:22:38,190 --> 00:22:41,403 takin' pictures you coulda saved that kid. 504 00:22:42,409 --> 00:22:45,488 (ominous orchestral music) (Don chuckling) 505 00:22:45,488 --> 00:22:48,488 - [Delbert] All right, that does it. 506 00:22:50,130 --> 00:22:51,742 - But we moved to Newport News, Virginia, 507 00:22:51,742 --> 00:22:54,293 which is pretty much where my journey began. 508 00:22:54,293 --> 00:22:57,043 (toilet flushes) 509 00:22:59,460 --> 00:23:01,010 They're messin' with our minds. 510 00:23:01,890 --> 00:23:03,163 Right? 511 00:23:05,121 --> 00:23:05,954 Yeah, see? 512 00:23:05,954 --> 00:23:07,193 He knows the situation. 513 00:23:08,300 --> 00:23:11,673 Ya see, everywhere ya go they got this easy listenin' shit. 514 00:23:13,210 --> 00:23:15,360 Well, I used to work in a slaughter house 515 00:23:16,200 --> 00:23:18,610 and ya know what they had playin' in there? 516 00:23:18,610 --> 00:23:20,800 The exact same shit. 517 00:23:20,800 --> 00:23:23,020 A thousand and one violins play the hits 518 00:23:23,020 --> 00:23:25,490 of the Grateful Dead, shit like that. 519 00:23:25,490 --> 00:23:28,513 Shit that makes Perry Como sound like Iggy Pop. 520 00:23:29,590 --> 00:23:31,413 Course it wasn't for our benefit. 521 00:23:33,260 --> 00:23:35,530 It was for the pigs. 522 00:23:35,530 --> 00:23:38,239 - [Man] Put a sock in it, sausage mouth! 523 00:23:38,239 --> 00:23:39,880 Don't you ever shut up? 524 00:23:39,880 --> 00:23:42,630 (toilet flushes) 525 00:23:48,320 --> 00:23:49,680 - I'm sorry, friend. 526 00:23:49,680 --> 00:23:51,800 I wasn't aware that I was bothering you. 527 00:23:51,800 --> 00:23:53,740 I will be quiet immediately. 528 00:23:53,740 --> 00:23:56,340 Or how 'bout I come over there and cut a big grin 529 00:23:56,340 --> 00:23:58,123 in your throat, ya piece of shit? 530 00:23:59,780 --> 00:24:01,670 And don't think I can't do it either. 531 00:24:01,670 --> 00:24:03,890 - [Man] Ooh, I'm really shakin' now. 532 00:24:09,380 --> 00:24:11,980 - I'm not really supposed to have matches, you know. 533 00:24:14,259 --> 00:24:19,259 Yeah. (match strikes) 534 00:24:19,461 --> 00:24:22,860 Ya see, it's all part of a diabolical experiment 535 00:24:22,860 --> 00:24:24,931 conducted by these-- 536 00:24:24,931 --> 00:24:27,330 (keys rattling in a lock) 537 00:24:27,330 --> 00:24:28,163 Shh. 538 00:24:29,450 --> 00:24:31,073 I think they may be on to me. 539 00:24:32,300 --> 00:24:34,179 Act natural. 540 00:24:34,179 --> 00:24:37,179 (footsteps tapping) 541 00:24:38,253 --> 00:24:41,650 (club banging on metal bars) 542 00:24:41,650 --> 00:24:42,500 - Delbert Mosley? 543 00:24:47,696 --> 00:24:48,529 - Delbert? 544 00:24:49,460 --> 00:24:50,360 - Don't rub it in. 545 00:24:52,050 --> 00:24:54,945 - [Cellmate] Who would name their kid Delbert? 546 00:24:54,945 --> 00:24:56,233 - All right, you're bailed out. 547 00:25:00,150 --> 00:25:02,250 - Your parents should be the ones in here. 548 00:25:03,270 --> 00:25:04,623 - I seen a alien once. 549 00:25:06,690 --> 00:25:10,107 (light orchestral music) 550 00:25:12,797 --> 00:25:15,547 (men chattering) 551 00:25:19,610 --> 00:25:21,120 - Oh, hi. 552 00:25:21,120 --> 00:25:23,180 Oh, I brought you coffee. 553 00:25:23,180 --> 00:25:24,630 - Sheesh. 554 00:25:24,630 --> 00:25:27,033 You people are like pit bulls, ya don't let go. 555 00:25:27,900 --> 00:25:30,040 - Listen, I just bailed you out. 556 00:25:30,040 --> 00:25:32,723 The least You could do is listen to me for a minute. 557 00:25:35,150 --> 00:25:36,050 - Thank you. 558 00:25:36,050 --> 00:25:39,550 I appreciate what you've done for me and I'll pay ya back. 559 00:25:39,550 --> 00:25:40,571 - Oh no, that-- 560 00:25:40,571 --> 00:25:42,140 - But you're wasting your time. 561 00:25:42,140 --> 00:25:44,510 The reporter, the alleged reporter, 562 00:25:44,510 --> 00:25:45,750 made the entire story up. 563 00:25:45,750 --> 00:25:48,580 There are no vacationing aliens. 564 00:25:48,580 --> 00:25:50,740 - Tell me about the camera. 565 00:25:50,740 --> 00:25:52,700 - Why are you doing this? 566 00:25:52,700 --> 00:25:56,300 You're an attractive person, a very attractive person. 567 00:25:56,300 --> 00:25:58,040 Don't ya have better things to do? 568 00:25:58,040 --> 00:26:00,040 Uh, hobbies? 569 00:26:00,040 --> 00:26:00,873 - Here. 570 00:26:04,440 --> 00:26:05,692 That's my father. 571 00:26:05,692 --> 00:26:08,570 (eerie music) He disappeared in 1969. 572 00:26:08,570 --> 00:26:10,010 He went out hunting with a friend 573 00:26:10,010 --> 00:26:13,880 in a Studebaker pickup truck and we never saw him again. 574 00:26:13,880 --> 00:26:15,263 - You're the little girl. 575 00:26:17,254 --> 00:26:18,087 - What? 576 00:26:18,087 --> 00:26:19,830 - In front of the house with the doll. 577 00:26:21,170 --> 00:26:22,770 - Oh, there are more pictures? 578 00:26:22,770 --> 00:26:23,850 - Yeah, a couple. 579 00:26:23,850 --> 00:26:24,683 The Moon didn't use 'em. 580 00:26:24,683 --> 00:26:25,980 They weren't sensational enough. 581 00:26:25,980 --> 00:26:28,970 Your feet, you and your mom waving goodbye. 582 00:26:28,970 --> 00:26:30,720 They're at my place in Bakersfield. 583 00:26:31,720 --> 00:26:33,930 - Where did you find my father's camera? 584 00:26:33,930 --> 00:26:35,760 - Some pack rat's yard sale. 585 00:26:35,760 --> 00:26:36,930 God knows where he found it. 586 00:26:36,930 --> 00:26:38,303 Some other yard sale. 587 00:26:41,860 --> 00:26:42,693 - Well, thanks. 588 00:26:44,090 --> 00:26:47,145 - Look, I'm sorry I couldn't help any more. 589 00:26:47,145 --> 00:26:50,663 It just seems like a dead end. 590 00:26:55,030 --> 00:26:57,607 - Excuse me, it's just that these pictures 591 00:26:57,607 --> 00:27:01,883 are the first, the only clues we've ever had. 592 00:27:04,210 --> 00:27:07,960 All those years Mom wondered if it was something that 593 00:27:09,020 --> 00:27:10,940 she did to drive him away 594 00:27:10,940 --> 00:27:13,823 or was it an accident? 595 00:27:14,850 --> 00:27:16,937 Did he get lost in the mountains? 596 00:27:16,937 --> 00:27:19,690 Or did he just 597 00:27:19,690 --> 00:27:22,883 go off somewhere and start a new life? 598 00:27:27,010 --> 00:27:30,193 It was the not knowing that killed her. 599 00:27:31,383 --> 00:27:34,373 Last year her broken heart just stopped. 600 00:27:37,070 --> 00:27:40,513 Well, I am not going to my grave without an answer. 601 00:27:40,513 --> 00:27:43,770 (somber orchestral music) 602 00:27:43,770 --> 00:27:45,870 - Well, I hope you find out what happened. 603 00:27:54,060 --> 00:27:54,893 Here. 604 00:27:55,760 --> 00:27:57,560 Let me get your address so I can 605 00:27:57,560 --> 00:27:59,743 send you a check and the photos. 606 00:28:01,791 --> 00:28:02,641 Do ya have a pen? 607 00:28:04,580 --> 00:28:05,780 - It feels like falling. 608 00:28:09,220 --> 00:28:10,053 - What? 609 00:28:12,490 --> 00:28:14,863 - Not knowing, it kinda feels like falling. 610 00:28:20,190 --> 00:28:24,560 Listen, um, I don't mean to sound bourgeois, 611 00:28:24,560 --> 00:28:27,743 but are you really a Pulitzer Prize winner? 612 00:28:30,190 --> 00:28:31,963 - Well, it was a few years ago. 613 00:28:33,569 --> 00:28:35,300 (laughs) 614 00:28:35,300 --> 00:28:37,303 I'm a freelance photojournalist. 615 00:28:38,580 --> 00:28:41,841 It's kind of a euphemism for being unemployed. 616 00:28:41,841 --> 00:28:44,091 (chuckles) 617 00:28:45,440 --> 00:28:49,020 Look, well I'm obviously not very busy at this stage 618 00:28:49,020 --> 00:28:52,570 in my life, and why don't you say we team up 619 00:28:52,570 --> 00:28:54,250 and try to track this thing down? 620 00:28:54,250 --> 00:28:56,283 See if we can figure out what happened. 621 00:28:57,190 --> 00:28:58,023 - You'd do that? 622 00:29:00,168 --> 00:29:01,001 - Yeah. 623 00:29:01,001 --> 00:29:02,880 I mean, I owe ya. 624 00:29:02,880 --> 00:29:05,970 And my truck's been towed by now. 625 00:29:05,970 --> 00:29:09,110 It's not worth what it would cost to get outta hock. 626 00:29:09,110 --> 00:29:10,003 I need a ride. 627 00:29:12,915 --> 00:29:14,763 - (exhales) Where do we start? 628 00:29:16,006 --> 00:29:18,801 (crickets chirping) 629 00:29:18,801 --> 00:29:22,307 (engine rumbling) 630 00:29:22,307 --> 00:29:23,757 - That's it, that's it, stop. 631 00:29:42,010 --> 00:29:42,843 Huh. 632 00:29:44,832 --> 00:29:46,763 These must be getting popular again. 633 00:29:49,410 --> 00:29:50,403 - I like her hair. 634 00:29:52,270 --> 00:29:53,520 - [Realtor] You're early. 635 00:29:55,010 --> 00:29:56,610 - We are? 636 00:29:56,610 --> 00:29:58,313 - You're not Mr. and Mrs. Wong? 637 00:30:00,920 --> 00:30:03,003 No, of course you're not, are you? 638 00:30:05,329 --> 00:30:07,330 - Do you know where the owner is? 639 00:30:07,330 --> 00:30:08,930 - [Realtor] Dead, of course. 640 00:30:08,930 --> 00:30:09,763 - What? 641 00:30:09,763 --> 00:30:11,480 - This is a probate sale. 642 00:30:11,480 --> 00:30:12,760 - [Delbert] What happened. 643 00:30:12,760 --> 00:30:15,520 - Well, she died. 644 00:30:15,520 --> 00:30:16,400 - She? 645 00:30:16,400 --> 00:30:19,866 No, no, the owner was a guy, grubby. 646 00:30:19,866 --> 00:30:21,290 - Oh, him. 647 00:30:21,290 --> 00:30:22,210 Haywood Roussell. 648 00:30:22,210 --> 00:30:23,780 He was a renter. 649 00:30:23,780 --> 00:30:26,443 The woman who owned this place died last year. 650 00:30:26,443 --> 00:30:28,970 Are you a homeowner? 651 00:30:28,970 --> 00:30:29,803 - No. 652 00:30:29,803 --> 00:30:30,660 - I am. 653 00:30:30,660 --> 00:30:31,830 - Oh, good for you. 654 00:30:31,830 --> 00:30:33,370 That's very smart. 655 00:30:33,370 --> 00:30:36,450 So, I take it you're a renter, then? 656 00:30:36,450 --> 00:30:37,290 - [Delbert] Yes, uh-- 657 00:30:37,290 --> 00:30:39,790 - Do you know that when you pay rent 658 00:30:39,790 --> 00:30:42,495 you're paying 100% interest? 659 00:30:42,495 --> 00:30:43,900 - Uh-huh. 660 00:30:43,900 --> 00:30:45,540 - Oh, do you know where he moved? 661 00:30:45,540 --> 00:30:48,090 Did he leave a forwarding address or anything? 662 00:30:48,090 --> 00:30:48,923 - Roussell? 663 00:30:48,923 --> 00:30:50,030 Not a clue. 664 00:30:50,030 --> 00:30:51,940 He sold everything that wasn't nailed down 665 00:30:51,940 --> 00:30:55,000 and he still couldn't pay all the back rent he owed. 666 00:30:55,000 --> 00:30:57,910 He's probably living in a car someplace for all I know. 667 00:30:57,910 --> 00:31:01,203 Which is really foolish because it doesn't build equity. 668 00:31:02,380 --> 00:31:05,345 I suppose it might have its tax advantages, though. 669 00:31:05,345 --> 00:31:09,110 (hand pounding on roof) 670 00:31:09,110 --> 00:31:10,520 - Praise the Lord! 671 00:31:10,520 --> 00:31:14,670 No dry rot, no termites, and plenty of crawlspace 672 00:31:14,670 --> 00:31:16,730 for cable hookups. 673 00:31:16,730 --> 00:31:18,440 - Personality plus. 674 00:31:18,440 --> 00:31:21,800 And the down payment is negotiable. 675 00:31:21,800 --> 00:31:22,813 - Hallelujah! 676 00:31:26,631 --> 00:31:28,690 - I think I better go close this sale 677 00:31:28,690 --> 00:31:30,733 while God's still on my side. 678 00:31:32,370 --> 00:31:33,203 - Thank you. 679 00:31:40,420 --> 00:31:41,713 What are you doing? 680 00:31:45,340 --> 00:31:47,973 - Mr. Haywood Roussell, 1710 Terra Bella. 681 00:31:49,770 --> 00:31:51,820 - Well, that address isn't gonna help us. 682 00:31:52,947 --> 00:31:55,500 - Well, the post office won't forward junk mail, 683 00:31:55,500 --> 00:31:58,063 but personal mail, that's a different story. 684 00:32:07,120 --> 00:32:08,170 - Where to now? 685 00:32:08,170 --> 00:32:09,003 - 1969. 686 00:32:15,450 --> 00:32:16,580 - We're not far enough yet. 687 00:32:16,580 --> 00:32:18,200 Keep going. 688 00:32:18,200 --> 00:32:19,400 - [Delbert] What month was it? 689 00:32:19,400 --> 00:32:20,970 - [Paige] August 1969. 690 00:32:20,970 --> 00:32:22,873 - Ah, Woodstock. 691 00:32:23,960 --> 00:32:24,793 I wasn't there. 692 00:32:27,610 --> 00:32:29,490 - What are we looking for? 693 00:32:29,490 --> 00:32:30,513 - Anything unusual. 694 00:32:32,110 --> 00:32:35,020 - What, like flying saucers landing? 695 00:32:35,020 --> 00:32:36,103 - Well yeah, that. 696 00:32:37,340 --> 00:32:40,536 UFO sightings, plane crashes, meteorites, 697 00:32:40,536 --> 00:32:43,583 weather balloons, strange lights, anything like that. 698 00:32:44,975 --> 00:32:47,018 We should check a few weeks before and after. 699 00:32:47,018 --> 00:32:48,403 - Okie dokie. 700 00:32:57,125 --> 00:33:00,292 (Paige clears throat) 701 00:33:09,130 --> 00:33:11,683 - You, um, you done yet? 702 00:33:15,970 --> 00:33:16,803 - Affirmative. 703 00:33:24,747 --> 00:33:27,910 (Delbert inhales) 704 00:33:27,910 --> 00:33:28,743 You ready? 705 00:33:31,660 --> 00:33:32,493 - What? 706 00:33:33,597 --> 00:33:35,210 - I'm finished with this page. 707 00:33:35,210 --> 00:33:36,043 Can we roll on? 708 00:33:36,043 --> 00:33:38,070 - Ah, yes, yes. 709 00:33:38,070 --> 00:33:38,903 Let's. 710 00:33:40,970 --> 00:33:42,470 Do you know, we have a lot of work to do. 711 00:33:42,470 --> 00:33:45,963 Why don't we split up and work separately on both machines. 712 00:33:46,880 --> 00:33:48,110 - Oh yeah, oh sure. 713 00:33:48,110 --> 00:33:48,943 Good idea. 714 00:33:51,708 --> 00:33:54,875 (Paige clears throat) 715 00:34:06,760 --> 00:34:11,760 Hey, "One small step for man, one giant leap for mankind?" 716 00:34:12,300 --> 00:34:14,343 - We don't care about us out there. 717 00:34:15,202 --> 00:34:17,293 We need something on them down here. 718 00:34:21,711 --> 00:34:24,878 (Paige clears throat) 719 00:34:30,620 --> 00:34:32,333 Oh God, Manson. 720 00:34:33,810 --> 00:34:37,393 (Paige groans disgustedly) 721 00:34:40,408 --> 00:34:44,325 (suspenseful orchestral music) 722 00:34:49,050 --> 00:34:50,040 Paige? 723 00:34:50,040 --> 00:34:51,240 You find something? 724 00:34:51,240 --> 00:34:53,917 - August 16th was the last time we saw him. 725 00:34:55,617 --> 00:34:57,100 - Wait a minute, there aren't any names. 726 00:34:57,100 --> 00:34:58,720 We need names. 727 00:34:58,720 --> 00:34:59,553 - Whose names? 728 00:35:01,091 --> 00:35:02,150 - The people who saw the UFOs. 729 00:35:02,150 --> 00:35:04,320 If they saw some flying saucers or something, 730 00:35:04,320 --> 00:35:06,630 they might've seen something else. 731 00:35:06,630 --> 00:35:08,510 - Like two men in a pickup truck? 732 00:35:08,510 --> 00:35:09,343 - Exactly. 733 00:35:11,330 --> 00:35:12,680 But there aren't any names. 734 00:35:13,880 --> 00:35:15,330 - Maybe they didn't want people thinking 735 00:35:15,330 --> 00:35:17,140 they were UFO freaks. 736 00:35:17,140 --> 00:35:18,490 - Yeah, I know the feeling. 737 00:35:20,260 --> 00:35:22,140 Wait a minute. 738 00:35:22,140 --> 00:35:22,973 UFO freaks. 739 00:35:23,920 --> 00:35:24,920 That's what we need. 740 00:35:28,266 --> 00:35:31,736 Oh God, let me still have it, please, please, please. 741 00:35:31,736 --> 00:35:32,569 - What? 742 00:35:32,569 --> 00:35:33,402 What do we need? 743 00:35:33,402 --> 00:35:34,910 - This. 744 00:35:34,910 --> 00:35:37,650 - Oh, that's what you were looking for? 745 00:35:37,650 --> 00:35:40,850 Listen, if you need gum all ya had to do was ask. 746 00:35:40,850 --> 00:35:42,540 - No, no, no, not the gum. 747 00:35:42,540 --> 00:35:44,593 The UFO freak who's stuck to it. 748 00:35:53,968 --> 00:35:54,801 - [Television Saleswoman] We're going to show, 749 00:35:54,801 --> 00:35:57,726 again, our most popular item today. 750 00:35:57,726 --> 00:36:01,920 This stunning bracelet encrusted with solid, 751 00:36:01,920 --> 00:36:05,126 compared to the 49, and cubic zirconium. 752 00:36:05,126 --> 00:36:06,517 Isn't it just the most gorgeous thing-- 753 00:36:06,517 --> 00:36:07,473 - [Paige] Holy mackerel. 754 00:36:07,473 --> 00:36:10,529 - [Delbert] Will ya look at the size of that thing? 755 00:36:10,529 --> 00:36:12,200 (door squeaks) 756 00:36:12,200 --> 00:36:13,570 - Pretty impressive, huh? 757 00:36:13,570 --> 00:36:15,870 I can tune in the space shuttle or cartoons from Russia. 758 00:36:15,870 --> 00:36:17,370 You name it. 759 00:36:17,370 --> 00:36:19,470 - Come on in, I got nachos waitin'. 760 00:36:19,470 --> 00:36:20,303 Come on. 761 00:36:21,350 --> 00:36:22,230 I got near beer, too. 762 00:36:22,230 --> 00:36:23,180 Do you like near beer? 763 00:36:23,180 --> 00:36:24,250 I can't drink alcohol. 764 00:36:24,250 --> 00:36:25,150 Come on in. 765 00:36:25,150 --> 00:36:26,173 It makes me sweat. 766 00:36:27,256 --> 00:36:29,532 - [TV Saleswoman] $499.95. 767 00:36:29,532 --> 00:36:31,790 (suspenseful music) 768 00:36:31,790 --> 00:36:33,440 Pretty spectacular. 769 00:36:33,440 --> 00:36:36,287 If you are among the first 150 callers-- 770 00:36:37,139 --> 00:36:37,972 (door thuds) 771 00:36:37,972 --> 00:36:39,700 - Now, what was that exact date again? 772 00:36:40,600 --> 00:36:43,175 - Um, August 16, 1969. 773 00:36:43,175 --> 00:36:44,740 (keyboard clicking) 774 00:36:44,740 --> 00:36:46,100 - Hmm. 775 00:36:46,100 --> 00:36:48,870 You may have got in just under the wire. 776 00:36:48,870 --> 00:36:51,350 All UFO sightings were investigated by the Air Force 777 00:36:51,350 --> 00:36:52,970 for Project Blue Book 'til they 778 00:36:52,970 --> 00:36:55,025 shut it down in '69. 779 00:36:55,025 --> 00:36:56,410 (scoffs) 780 00:36:56,410 --> 00:36:57,640 - Why did they stop? 781 00:36:57,640 --> 00:36:59,563 What happened in 1969? 782 00:37:00,860 --> 00:37:02,333 - Star Trek was canceled. 783 00:37:03,860 --> 00:37:05,312 - They put a man on the moon. 784 00:37:05,312 --> 00:37:07,135 - (chuckles) Yeah, and Nixon in the White House. 785 00:37:07,135 --> 00:37:09,190 - (laughs) Yeah. 786 00:37:09,190 --> 00:37:14,062 - Um, I really don't like cracks about Nixon. 787 00:37:14,062 --> 00:37:17,590 (computer beeping) 788 00:37:17,590 --> 00:37:20,040 - We're just gonna let that pass. 789 00:37:20,040 --> 00:37:23,200 Okay, almost got the search query ready. 790 00:37:23,200 --> 00:37:25,200 You know, you can't just go to a library 791 00:37:25,200 --> 00:37:26,820 and check out Project Blue Book. 792 00:37:26,820 --> 00:37:27,853 It's not even a real book. 793 00:37:27,853 --> 00:37:30,650 It's just a bunch of classified reports. 794 00:37:30,650 --> 00:37:32,351 So the only way to get 'em 795 00:37:32,351 --> 00:37:34,130 is through the Freedom of Information Act, 796 00:37:34,130 --> 00:37:35,920 which means writin' letters back and forth 797 00:37:35,920 --> 00:37:38,460 to a bunch of assholes in Washington. 798 00:37:38,460 --> 00:37:40,410 The only people who have time to do that 799 00:37:40,410 --> 00:37:44,037 are UFO freaks like moi livin' in trailer parks. 800 00:37:44,037 --> 00:37:47,000 We have over 10,000 pages of hypertext 801 00:37:47,000 --> 00:37:49,103 Blue Book documents online. 802 00:37:50,720 --> 00:37:52,513 Okay, there goes the search query. 803 00:37:53,870 --> 00:37:55,400 There's a lot of network traffic tonight. 804 00:37:55,400 --> 00:37:57,270 This may take a minute. 805 00:37:57,270 --> 00:38:00,453 - This is, um, quite a system you've got goin' here. 806 00:38:01,890 --> 00:38:05,910 - Yeah, I programmed it myself using DOD approved 807 00:38:05,910 --> 00:38:09,990 mill standard, 1815A Ada programming language. 808 00:38:09,990 --> 00:38:14,800 I mean, C and C++ is for bedwetting hackers and academics. 809 00:38:14,800 --> 00:38:16,147 You know, big pussies. 810 00:38:16,147 --> 00:38:19,130 (chuckles) 811 00:38:19,130 --> 00:38:22,230 - Somebody's watching us from that trailer over there. 812 00:38:22,230 --> 00:38:24,500 - Yeah, he just moved in. 813 00:38:24,500 --> 00:38:25,940 He's an alien. 814 00:38:25,940 --> 00:38:28,120 They sent him here to keep tabs on me. 815 00:38:28,120 --> 00:38:30,370 You know how to tell if someone's an alien? 816 00:38:30,370 --> 00:38:32,030 They always have their TVs tuned 817 00:38:32,030 --> 00:38:34,133 to those shop at home stations. 818 00:38:35,300 --> 00:38:36,433 Watch this. 819 00:38:39,050 --> 00:38:42,023 - [TV Saleswoman] Might be our most popular bracelet ever. 820 00:38:42,023 --> 00:38:44,110 - [Joleen] A little polka oughta stir things up. 821 00:38:44,110 --> 00:38:45,393 Especially if it's loud. 822 00:38:45,393 --> 00:38:46,575 (polka music) 823 00:38:46,575 --> 00:38:47,408 - [Man] Hey! 824 00:38:47,408 --> 00:38:48,241 What the hell? 825 00:38:48,241 --> 00:38:49,074 (Joleen laughing) Turn that off! 826 00:38:49,074 --> 00:38:51,688 - He's doin' the hokey pokey now. 827 00:38:51,688 --> 00:38:52,725 (man shouting) 828 00:38:52,725 --> 00:38:54,014 - [TV Saleswoman] $9.95. 829 00:38:54,014 --> 00:38:54,847 (polka music) 830 00:38:54,847 --> 00:38:55,680 - [Joleen] Ooh, look at him go. 831 00:38:55,680 --> 00:38:56,513 - [Man] Somebody turn this off! 832 00:38:56,513 --> 00:38:57,346 What is that? 833 00:38:57,346 --> 00:38:58,318 - Joleen, somethin's comin' in. 834 00:38:58,318 --> 00:38:59,799 - [Man] Hey, what the? 835 00:38:59,799 --> 00:39:02,160 (computer beeping) 836 00:39:02,160 --> 00:39:04,753 - You got in by the skin of your teeth. 837 00:39:04,753 --> 00:39:08,742 (suspenseful orchestral music) 838 00:39:08,742 --> 00:39:09,909 - A movie set. 839 00:39:11,170 --> 00:39:14,930 So, the first sightings were here in Twentynine Palms 840 00:39:14,930 --> 00:39:15,890 at 8:30 in the evening. 841 00:39:15,890 --> 00:39:16,723 - Mm-hm. 842 00:39:17,960 --> 00:39:19,795 - [Waitress] Yeah, there ya go, sugars. 843 00:39:19,795 --> 00:39:20,804 Enjoy. - Food, good. 844 00:39:20,804 --> 00:39:21,923 - [Delbert] What is that? 845 00:39:21,923 --> 00:39:23,800 - This is wrong. 846 00:39:23,800 --> 00:39:28,800 Um, yeah, over 100 people at the drive-in movies. 847 00:39:29,300 --> 00:39:32,030 Then there was a teacher and 18 kids 848 00:39:32,030 --> 00:39:33,600 at a camp down in Death Valley. 849 00:39:33,600 --> 00:39:34,620 Death Valley, where is it? 850 00:39:34,620 --> 00:39:37,110 - Mm, right there. 851 00:39:37,110 --> 00:39:38,440 - Okay. 852 00:39:38,440 --> 00:39:41,720 Um, and some Jehovah's Witnesses waiting on the front porch 853 00:39:41,720 --> 00:39:43,557 of a house in Bakersfield. 854 00:39:43,557 --> 00:39:44,390 - Bakersfield. 855 00:39:44,390 --> 00:39:45,489 - [Paige] There. 856 00:39:45,489 --> 00:39:47,960 But we only have this one guy, Lyman Weeks, 857 00:39:47,960 --> 00:39:50,850 from Mt. Pinos who saw anything on the ground. 858 00:39:50,850 --> 00:39:52,480 - Lonely guy. 859 00:39:52,480 --> 00:39:55,843 And what he saw was a movie set. 860 00:39:58,550 --> 00:40:00,883 Your dad and his buddy are out hunting. 861 00:40:02,040 --> 00:40:02,873 Right? 862 00:40:02,873 --> 00:40:04,960 They see these big lights up in the sky. 863 00:40:04,960 --> 00:40:06,790 Same lights everybody else saw that evening 864 00:40:06,790 --> 00:40:09,880 and they follow them and they find this huge 865 00:40:09,880 --> 00:40:13,340 flying saucer squatting out in the middle of the woods, 866 00:40:13,340 --> 00:40:16,690 which they walk up to waving a white flag 867 00:40:16,690 --> 00:40:20,263 and suddenly, cut, it's a movie set. 868 00:40:21,290 --> 00:40:23,210 The whole crew has a great laugh 869 00:40:23,210 --> 00:40:24,750 at these two yokels who thought it was 870 00:40:24,750 --> 00:40:25,910 a real flying saucer. 871 00:40:25,910 --> 00:40:28,793 They end up getting their pictures taken with the actor. 872 00:40:30,900 --> 00:40:33,500 And now we know who else saw your father that night. 873 00:40:34,390 --> 00:40:36,110 - [Both] The movie people. 874 00:40:36,110 --> 00:40:37,750 Check! 875 00:40:37,750 --> 00:40:39,240 - Escape from Uranus? 876 00:40:39,240 --> 00:40:40,440 - [Delbert] Yeah, have you heard of it? 877 00:40:40,440 --> 00:40:42,360 - Of course I have, but we don't have it. 878 00:40:42,360 --> 00:40:43,937 Nobody does. 879 00:40:43,937 --> 00:40:46,645 (light electronic music) 880 00:40:46,645 --> 00:40:48,640 - Well, what do you know about it? 881 00:40:48,640 --> 00:40:50,720 - It was the jinx movie. 882 00:40:50,720 --> 00:40:52,250 The film was never even finished. 883 00:40:52,250 --> 00:40:53,900 The negative burned up in a fire. 884 00:40:54,780 --> 00:40:57,318 - What about the people in it, the cast and crew? 885 00:40:57,318 --> 00:40:59,663 - That is the best part of the story. 886 00:41:00,560 --> 00:41:02,780 They started filming with Boris Karloff, 887 00:41:02,780 --> 00:41:04,930 who was playing this kind of wheelchair bound, 888 00:41:04,930 --> 00:41:06,440 mean and merciless type character, 889 00:41:06,440 --> 00:41:09,240 but he died three days into production. 890 00:41:09,240 --> 00:41:10,970 So, they recast with some look alike 891 00:41:10,970 --> 00:41:12,800 and tried to finish the picture. 892 00:41:12,800 --> 00:41:14,870 The director disappeared the very next year. 893 00:41:14,870 --> 00:41:16,973 So did the producer I think. 894 00:41:16,973 --> 00:41:17,806 And then a whole lot of the crew either died 895 00:41:17,806 --> 00:41:19,220 or disappeared within, like, the next 10 years. 896 00:41:19,220 --> 00:41:21,510 I mean, it is a film of mythic proportions. 897 00:41:21,510 --> 00:41:22,720 The stuff of Hollywood legend. 898 00:41:22,720 --> 00:41:24,950 - Well, what about the movie studio that paid them. 899 00:41:24,950 --> 00:41:28,010 - (chuckles) It was independently financed. 900 00:41:28,010 --> 00:41:29,680 You've heard of low budget. 901 00:41:29,680 --> 00:41:31,390 This was like, no budget. 902 00:41:31,390 --> 00:41:34,120 I mean, it's like this film never existed. 903 00:41:34,120 --> 00:41:35,360 It would've been kind of a dinosaur anyway 904 00:41:35,360 --> 00:41:36,500 had it actually ever been released. 905 00:41:36,500 --> 00:41:38,410 I mean, 2001 came out in '68, 906 00:41:38,410 --> 00:41:40,610 kinda revolutionized the whole sci-fi genre. 907 00:41:42,960 --> 00:41:47,123 - [Paige] Well, isn't anybody left from the movie? 908 00:41:47,970 --> 00:41:49,241 - Well, there was one woman. 909 00:41:49,241 --> 00:41:51,390 Oh, who was that? 910 00:41:51,390 --> 00:41:52,900 She was in Lost in Space for a while 911 00:41:52,900 --> 00:41:54,560 or was that My Favorite Martian? 912 00:41:54,560 --> 00:41:55,393 Um, 913 00:41:57,280 --> 00:41:58,920 Bunny Wells, that's it. 914 00:41:58,920 --> 00:41:59,870 She's still around. 915 00:42:02,227 --> 00:42:05,283 (upbeat dance music) 916 00:42:05,283 --> 00:42:06,116 - You think we'll be able to find her? 917 00:42:06,116 --> 00:42:08,430 - Oh, I got a couple ideas. 918 00:42:08,430 --> 00:42:10,340 I gotta find a motel first, though. 919 00:42:10,340 --> 00:42:11,850 My house is too far away. 920 00:42:11,850 --> 00:42:13,990 - No, you'll stay at my place. 921 00:42:13,990 --> 00:42:15,650 Beautiful downtown Burbank. 922 00:42:15,650 --> 00:42:17,656 - No, I don't wanna impose. 923 00:42:17,656 --> 00:42:21,450 - Oh come on, don't give me that polite stuff. 924 00:42:21,450 --> 00:42:23,767 - No really, I mean, you don't even know me. 925 00:42:23,767 --> 00:42:24,945 - Sure I do. 926 00:42:24,945 --> 00:42:26,563 You're a Pulitzer Prize winner. 927 00:42:27,930 --> 00:42:28,920 - For all you know I could be a guy 928 00:42:28,920 --> 00:42:30,790 that jumps on the furniture. 929 00:42:30,790 --> 00:42:32,140 - Hell, I do that myself. 930 00:42:32,140 --> 00:42:33,380 Besides, we're partners. 931 00:42:33,380 --> 00:42:34,603 You'll stay at my place. 932 00:42:38,307 --> 00:42:41,307 (crickets chirping) 933 00:42:44,668 --> 00:42:48,600 (clears throat) Here's your blankets and stuff. 934 00:42:48,600 --> 00:42:51,323 - Say, what is it with you and Mr. Nixon? 935 00:42:53,210 --> 00:42:56,910 - Oh, um, well, 936 00:42:56,910 --> 00:42:59,003 it's kind of a personal, private thing. 937 00:43:00,400 --> 00:43:02,410 - Oh (chuckles) okay. 938 00:43:02,410 --> 00:43:06,408 A personal private thing between you and the ex-president? 939 00:43:06,408 --> 00:43:07,840 Enough said. 940 00:43:07,840 --> 00:43:09,570 Okay, alrighty then. 941 00:43:09,570 --> 00:43:10,403 - Thanks. 942 00:43:11,730 --> 00:43:14,210 Okay, um, two rules. 943 00:43:14,210 --> 00:43:17,890 The toilet seat is to remain in the down position 944 00:43:17,890 --> 00:43:21,550 immediately after use and, um, 945 00:43:21,550 --> 00:43:24,180 no jumping on the furniture before six a.m. 946 00:43:24,180 --> 00:43:25,660 (chuckles) 947 00:43:25,660 --> 00:43:29,973 Oh, I brought you some clean clothes. 948 00:43:34,205 --> 00:43:39,205 (chuckles) Uh, well, you might need a skosh more room, 949 00:43:39,620 --> 00:43:40,943 whatever a skosh is. 950 00:43:42,150 --> 00:43:46,823 Yeah, these belonged to my old boyfriend. 951 00:43:48,640 --> 00:43:50,230 - Where's he nowadays? 952 00:43:50,230 --> 00:43:51,760 - Who, numbnuts? 953 00:43:51,760 --> 00:43:54,349 Somewhere with a stick up his ass. 954 00:43:54,349 --> 00:43:55,730 - Well, it's good to see ya don't bear a grudge. 955 00:43:55,730 --> 00:43:57,630 - Oh, yeah, well. 956 00:43:57,630 --> 00:44:01,980 He was just such a, God, 957 00:44:01,980 --> 00:44:03,650 Dentist. 958 00:44:03,650 --> 00:44:07,853 Just in it for the money, no philosophical underpinning. 959 00:44:09,320 --> 00:44:11,820 - I don't mean to sound bourgeois, 960 00:44:11,820 --> 00:44:14,963 but what is it you do exactly? 961 00:44:16,249 --> 00:44:19,499 (instruments clicking) 962 00:44:21,300 --> 00:44:24,133 - Oh yeah, you have great teeth. 963 00:44:25,250 --> 00:44:26,973 I'd watch the lingual side of 17, though. 964 00:44:26,973 --> 00:44:29,220 It's a little soft. 965 00:44:29,220 --> 00:44:33,070 You should use a fluoride rinse and definitely floss-- 966 00:44:33,070 --> 00:44:33,975 - More often. 967 00:44:33,975 --> 00:44:36,570 (Paige laughs) 968 00:44:36,570 --> 00:44:39,600 - Ah, President Nixon had the right philosophy. 969 00:44:39,600 --> 00:44:41,840 It's why I became a dentist. 970 00:44:41,840 --> 00:44:44,240 This chance meeting that became 971 00:44:44,240 --> 00:44:47,230 the turning point in my life. 972 00:44:47,230 --> 00:44:51,631 I was 17 working at Burger King off the 101 in Oxnard, 973 00:44:51,631 --> 00:44:55,580 closed up around midnight, went out to the parking lot, 974 00:44:55,580 --> 00:44:58,272 and found Nixon hiding in the backseat. 975 00:44:58,272 --> 00:44:59,430 (chuckles) 976 00:44:59,430 --> 00:45:00,850 He was kinda frightened. 977 00:45:00,850 --> 00:45:04,663 He had gotten separated from his Secret Service men somehow. 978 00:45:04,663 --> 00:45:06,063 A little paranoid, you know. 979 00:45:08,163 --> 00:45:10,333 Well, this was years after he resigned. 980 00:45:11,290 --> 00:45:12,347 He looked weary. 981 00:45:12,347 --> 00:45:14,470 I felt bad for him. 982 00:45:14,470 --> 00:45:17,030 So I offered him some of my cheeseburger. 983 00:45:17,030 --> 00:45:18,530 He had never had a Whopper before. 984 00:45:18,530 --> 00:45:19,363 He liked it. 985 00:45:20,426 --> 00:45:23,360 Gave him some of my Dr. Pepper, liked that, too. 986 00:45:23,360 --> 00:45:24,753 One of those little pies. 987 00:45:26,260 --> 00:45:30,870 And after we finished he pulled out some toothpaste 988 00:45:30,870 --> 00:45:34,600 and two brand new toothbrushes still in the wrapper 989 00:45:35,440 --> 00:45:36,870 and we brushed our teeth together 990 00:45:36,870 --> 00:45:38,420 right there in the parking lot. 991 00:45:39,308 --> 00:45:43,170 Then, he brought out dental floss 992 00:45:44,250 --> 00:45:47,090 and President Nixon stressed to me 993 00:45:47,090 --> 00:45:49,030 the importance of dental hygiene 994 00:45:50,373 --> 00:45:54,263 because he said, and I'll never forget this, 995 00:45:55,280 --> 00:46:00,280 he said, "As long as you have good teeth, Paige," 996 00:46:03,007 --> 00:46:04,887 "you're never entirely lost." 997 00:46:08,637 --> 00:46:12,527 "When all else fails at least you'll have a nice smile." 998 00:46:13,800 --> 00:46:15,203 And then he smiled. 999 00:46:16,670 --> 00:46:18,913 Oh, I get chills just thinkin' about it now. 1000 00:46:20,503 --> 00:46:22,803 Made the hair on the back of my neck stand up. 1001 00:46:24,920 --> 00:46:26,820 Can't just ignore somethin' like that. 1002 00:46:27,670 --> 00:46:29,083 I became a dentist. 1003 00:46:30,710 --> 00:46:31,713 Swish and spit. 1004 00:46:35,440 --> 00:46:38,220 - Well, at least ya didn't vote for him. 1005 00:46:38,220 --> 00:46:39,453 - Gimme a break. 1006 00:46:42,570 --> 00:46:43,643 I was too young. 1007 00:46:48,143 --> 00:46:49,362 (Delbert gulps) 1008 00:46:49,362 --> 00:46:50,966 (light orchestral music) 1009 00:46:50,966 --> 00:46:53,790 (chuckles) Look at these clones. 1010 00:46:53,790 --> 00:46:55,450 I hope they had tattoos or birthmarks, 1011 00:46:55,450 --> 00:46:56,840 somethin' to tell 'em apart. 1012 00:46:56,840 --> 00:46:58,410 - Which year is that one? 1013 00:46:58,410 --> 00:46:59,520 - '69. 1014 00:46:59,520 --> 00:47:02,990 - Well, she's not in '70, so the latest one 1015 00:47:02,990 --> 00:47:03,933 she's in is '69. 1016 00:47:05,240 --> 00:47:06,670 - Yeah. 1017 00:47:06,670 --> 00:47:07,570 - Who's her agent? 1018 00:47:09,040 --> 00:47:10,053 - [Paige] De Salvo. 1019 00:47:11,320 --> 00:47:13,210 - [Delbert] De Salvo Realty. 1020 00:47:13,210 --> 00:47:15,030 Though I suppose it could be the same guy. 1021 00:47:15,030 --> 00:47:16,080 - Let's check it out. 1022 00:47:20,470 --> 00:47:23,220 (elevator dings) 1023 00:47:24,086 --> 00:47:25,330 (knocking at the door) 1024 00:47:25,330 --> 00:47:26,723 - Door's open, come on in. 1025 00:47:28,386 --> 00:47:29,670 No, no, no it's no problem. 1026 00:47:29,670 --> 00:47:31,350 I'll take care of it, don't worry. 1027 00:47:31,350 --> 00:47:34,010 Look, I've got company, I'll call ya back. 1028 00:47:34,010 --> 00:47:35,547 Okay, bye-bye now. 1029 00:47:37,310 --> 00:47:39,050 Oh hi! 1030 00:47:39,050 --> 00:47:40,850 The renter. 1031 00:47:40,850 --> 00:47:43,963 Are we ready to buy that cute little starter? 1032 00:47:44,909 --> 00:47:46,716 - Uh, no. 1033 00:47:46,716 --> 00:47:50,283 We're looking for Manny De Salvo. 1034 00:47:51,150 --> 00:47:56,150 - Oh, Manny's dead, but I'm Mrs. De Salvo and I'm not. 1035 00:47:56,629 --> 00:47:59,850 Now, you walk like someone who knows how to swing a hammer 1036 00:47:59,850 --> 00:48:02,573 and I have the perfect fixer upper. 1037 00:48:03,520 --> 00:48:07,020 - Actually, we're not here so much to meet Mr. De Salvo 1038 00:48:07,020 --> 00:48:09,523 as we are an actress that he used to represent. 1039 00:48:10,500 --> 00:48:12,040 - Really? 1040 00:48:12,040 --> 00:48:13,853 Well, Manny was my agent. 1041 00:48:14,810 --> 00:48:18,333 Do you remember me, Bunny Wells? 1042 00:48:26,900 --> 00:48:28,513 Please, sit down. 1043 00:48:37,090 --> 00:48:38,410 Oh, sure. 1044 00:48:38,410 --> 00:48:40,550 I remember these guys. 1045 00:48:40,550 --> 00:48:42,360 We were right in the middle of a shot 1046 00:48:42,360 --> 00:48:43,947 and they came running in yelling, 1047 00:48:43,947 --> 00:48:44,780 "Welcome! 1048 00:48:44,780 --> 00:48:45,740 "Welcome to Earth!" 1049 00:48:45,740 --> 00:48:48,010 We laughed our asses off. 1050 00:48:48,010 --> 00:48:49,480 - He doesn't look like he's laughing. 1051 00:48:49,480 --> 00:48:51,540 - Oh, the director put them in as extras. 1052 00:48:51,540 --> 00:48:52,940 Anything to save a buck. 1053 00:48:52,940 --> 00:48:54,570 And it showed. 1054 00:48:54,570 --> 00:48:56,340 I didn't hang around with them very much. 1055 00:48:56,340 --> 00:48:58,020 They hung out with the crew mostly. 1056 00:48:58,020 --> 00:49:00,530 You know, sniffing around the makeup girl 1057 00:49:00,530 --> 00:49:02,603 and the wardrobe girl, the usual. 1058 00:49:03,450 --> 00:49:04,723 Which one was your dad? 1059 00:49:06,240 --> 00:49:07,073 - [Paige] That one. 1060 00:49:07,073 --> 00:49:08,920 - Oh, the handsome one. 1061 00:49:08,920 --> 00:49:09,753 - Yeah. 1062 00:49:11,700 --> 00:49:14,810 - So, you're his and Anne's daughter. 1063 00:49:14,810 --> 00:49:16,653 Is this about the probate sale? 1064 00:49:18,110 --> 00:49:19,050 - No. 1065 00:49:19,050 --> 00:49:19,883 Who's Anne? 1066 00:49:21,410 --> 00:49:26,410 - Look, honey, I know your daddy's been gone a long time, 1067 00:49:27,050 --> 00:49:29,130 and I'm not gonna bullshit you. 1068 00:49:29,130 --> 00:49:29,963 - Good. 1069 00:49:30,890 --> 00:49:33,820 - Anne Aspenwald was the wardrobe girl 1070 00:49:33,820 --> 00:49:38,597 and she and your dad got, you know, friendly. 1071 00:49:39,670 --> 00:49:40,883 Like rabbits. 1072 00:49:41,950 --> 00:49:44,070 Once shooting was over I lost track of them 1073 00:49:44,070 --> 00:49:46,900 but I heard they shacked, got married. 1074 00:49:46,900 --> 00:49:49,570 I'm sure it didn't last. 1075 00:49:49,570 --> 00:49:50,860 I don't know what happened to him, 1076 00:49:50,860 --> 00:49:53,793 but Anne was the homeowner, the dead one. 1077 00:49:54,988 --> 00:49:55,821 - What? 1078 00:49:55,821 --> 00:49:56,654 (dramatic orchestral music) 1079 00:49:56,654 --> 00:49:59,220 - The house where I met you with the dead owner? 1080 00:49:59,220 --> 00:50:01,741 That was Anne Aspenwald's. 1081 00:50:01,741 --> 00:50:04,041 - That would explain how the camera got there. 1082 00:50:05,350 --> 00:50:09,197 - She was a friend of Donna Sullivan, the makeup girl. 1083 00:50:09,197 --> 00:50:12,283 - (crying) And Roy was married, too? 1084 00:50:14,160 --> 00:50:15,324 Kids? 1085 00:50:15,324 --> 00:50:16,887 (gasps) 1086 00:50:16,887 --> 00:50:18,410 The son of a bitch. 1087 00:50:18,410 --> 00:50:20,577 (sobbing) 1088 00:50:22,787 --> 00:50:24,620 Oh, we didn't know they were married. 1089 00:50:24,620 --> 00:50:27,920 We thought they were just a couple of sweet guys. 1090 00:50:27,920 --> 00:50:28,753 (sobbing) 1091 00:50:28,753 --> 00:50:31,420 (ominous music) 1092 00:50:32,563 --> 00:50:35,146 (Donna crying) 1093 00:50:38,180 --> 00:50:39,080 - Picture matches. 1094 00:50:41,180 --> 00:50:43,340 - Um, what happened to them? 1095 00:50:43,340 --> 00:50:45,200 - Oh, I don't know. 1096 00:50:45,200 --> 00:50:48,023 What makes a man do that sort of thing? 1097 00:50:49,000 --> 00:50:50,230 Were they Mormons? 1098 00:50:50,230 --> 00:50:51,630 - No, no. 1099 00:50:51,630 --> 00:50:53,800 I meant what happened to them physically? 1100 00:50:53,800 --> 00:50:54,633 Where did they go? 1101 00:50:54,633 --> 00:50:55,683 What did they do? 1102 00:50:56,878 --> 00:50:59,930 - Well, Roy and I got married. 1103 00:50:59,930 --> 00:51:02,082 We were married for seven years. 1104 00:51:02,082 --> 00:51:05,743 (crying) Until his untimely death. 1105 00:51:09,651 --> 00:51:11,833 He fell down an elevator shaft. 1106 00:51:13,680 --> 00:51:15,264 - That's horrible. 1107 00:51:15,264 --> 00:51:16,431 What happened? 1108 00:51:17,554 --> 00:51:20,130 - Oh, some sort of malfunction. 1109 00:51:20,130 --> 00:51:23,520 He pushed the button, door opened, 1110 00:51:23,520 --> 00:51:25,180 he stepped in, 1111 00:51:25,180 --> 00:51:27,267 no elevator, just air. 1112 00:51:28,850 --> 00:51:29,842 Air. 1113 00:51:29,842 --> 00:51:32,790 (sobbing) 1114 00:51:32,790 --> 00:51:35,210 - Wait, what happened to my father? 1115 00:51:35,210 --> 00:51:36,163 To Emmett? 1116 00:51:37,918 --> 00:51:40,933 (Donna groans) 1117 00:51:40,933 --> 00:51:43,600 (Donna sobbing) 1118 00:51:50,858 --> 00:51:53,525 (Paige sobbing) 1119 00:51:56,720 --> 00:51:58,063 - Paige, this is bullshit. 1120 00:51:58,940 --> 00:52:01,223 - You're goddamn right it is. 1121 00:52:02,143 --> 00:52:05,140 I mean, all this time I thought he died 1122 00:52:05,140 --> 00:52:08,270 of exposure in the wilderness. 1123 00:52:08,270 --> 00:52:12,650 I mean, that had a little nobility, a little class. 1124 00:52:12,650 --> 00:52:15,990 But instead I find out he got knocked off 1125 00:52:15,990 --> 00:52:18,880 in a head-on collision on his way to Vegas 1126 00:52:18,880 --> 00:52:21,553 to marry some Hollywood slut. 1127 00:52:21,553 --> 00:52:23,860 (sobs) 1128 00:52:23,860 --> 00:52:24,993 Poor Mom. 1129 00:52:26,070 --> 00:52:26,903 Asshole! 1130 00:52:26,903 --> 00:52:28,037 - No, no, no. 1131 00:52:28,037 --> 00:52:29,433 Not that, this. 1132 00:52:30,270 --> 00:52:31,970 Look, somebody's jerking us around here. 1133 00:52:31,970 --> 00:52:33,423 Look at these dates. 1134 00:52:34,517 --> 00:52:38,203 1993, '92, '90, '91. 1135 00:52:39,430 --> 00:52:40,680 This is a new section. 1136 00:52:40,680 --> 00:52:43,993 Why is there a 25 year-old grave here? 1137 00:52:46,610 --> 00:52:49,350 - Oh my God, you're right. 1138 00:52:49,350 --> 00:52:53,460 - Ah yes, that would be Section E, Row 12, 1139 00:52:53,460 --> 00:52:55,900 the Everlasting Slumber Enclave. 1140 00:52:55,900 --> 00:52:58,800 That's a wonderful area, overlooks the freeway. 1141 00:52:58,800 --> 00:53:02,253 At night if you go out there, lay down, 1142 00:53:03,120 --> 00:53:06,324 close your eyes, it's as if you hear the ocean. 1143 00:53:06,324 --> 00:53:08,824 (organ music) 1144 00:53:11,051 --> 00:53:13,180 - Um, Emmett Davis? 1145 00:53:13,180 --> 00:53:14,293 - 1969? 1146 00:53:17,374 --> 00:53:18,974 - Yes, yes, you told me already. 1147 00:53:22,010 --> 00:53:23,454 Here we are. 1148 00:53:23,454 --> 00:53:25,610 Um, E-12, 1149 00:53:25,610 --> 00:53:26,733 Plot 44. 1150 00:53:28,838 --> 00:53:32,005 Well, I'm afraid you must be mistaken. 1151 00:53:33,770 --> 00:53:34,833 That's an empty plot. 1152 00:53:36,280 --> 00:53:37,943 There's nobody there. 1153 00:53:37,943 --> 00:53:40,526 (car rumbling) 1154 00:53:42,896 --> 00:53:43,729 (dramatic music) 1155 00:53:43,729 --> 00:53:45,625 - The alien mask, it's gone. 1156 00:53:45,625 --> 00:53:46,507 - Oh. 1157 00:53:46,507 --> 00:53:47,340 (liquid squelches) 1158 00:53:47,340 --> 00:53:48,311 (Delbert grunts) (Paige gasps) 1159 00:53:48,311 --> 00:53:49,978 Oh! - Son of a bitch. 1160 00:53:49,978 --> 00:53:50,811 - So! (Paige screams) 1161 00:53:50,811 --> 00:53:52,644 It was you who did it. 1162 00:53:54,833 --> 00:53:57,510 Okay, then you clean it up. 1163 00:53:57,510 --> 00:53:59,700 - We didn't do anything, we just got here. 1164 00:53:59,700 --> 00:54:01,849 - Ah sure, act innocent. 1165 00:54:01,849 --> 00:54:03,743 - Well, was somebody hurt here? 1166 00:54:04,830 --> 00:54:06,350 - That's stage blood. 1167 00:54:06,350 --> 00:54:08,000 This is Hollywood. 1168 00:54:08,000 --> 00:54:08,833 Hello? 1169 00:54:09,890 --> 00:54:11,840 Ah never mind, I'll clean it up myself. 1170 00:54:13,480 --> 00:54:15,770 I got a lower back injury and a rash on my left hand 1171 00:54:15,770 --> 00:54:18,091 that burns whenever I get it wet, 1172 00:54:18,091 --> 00:54:19,441 but why should that matter? 1173 00:54:20,639 --> 00:54:23,556 (bottle squirting) 1174 00:54:25,710 --> 00:54:28,470 I won an Academy Award and here I am, Walter Danverstein, 1175 00:54:28,470 --> 00:54:30,413 cleanin' up this crap. 1176 00:54:32,550 --> 00:54:34,518 And I got Sasquatch here steppin' in it 1177 00:54:34,518 --> 00:54:37,180 and trackin' it all over the place. 1178 00:54:37,180 --> 00:54:39,820 - What am I supposed to do, levitate? 1179 00:54:39,820 --> 00:54:41,133 - We're lookin' for Donna. 1180 00:54:42,460 --> 00:54:43,293 - Donna who? 1181 00:54:44,210 --> 00:54:47,833 - Donna Sullivan, the makeup department supervisor? 1182 00:54:49,550 --> 00:54:51,040 - I'm the supervisor. 1183 00:54:51,040 --> 00:54:53,000 This is my shop. 1184 00:54:53,000 --> 00:54:54,290 Donna Sullivan was barely an assistant. 1185 00:54:54,290 --> 00:54:56,189 She hasn't worked here since 1969. 1186 00:54:56,189 --> 00:54:57,590 (suspenseful music) 1187 00:54:57,590 --> 00:54:58,600 You people make me sick! 1188 00:54:58,600 --> 00:55:00,610 Don't you read the credits at the end of the movie, huh? 1189 00:55:00,610 --> 00:55:02,710 Or were you too busy lookin' for your car keys? 1190 00:55:02,710 --> 00:55:05,050 I'm Walter Danverstein, I won an Oscar. 1191 00:55:05,050 --> 00:55:06,210 This is my shop. 1192 00:55:06,210 --> 00:55:07,780 I tell everybody what to do. 1193 00:55:07,780 --> 00:55:09,040 Okay, that's lunch! 1194 00:55:09,040 --> 00:55:10,280 30 minutes. 1195 00:55:10,280 --> 00:55:11,874 Ya see? 1196 00:55:11,874 --> 00:55:13,166 (door slams) 1197 00:55:13,166 --> 00:55:14,378 (knocking on door) 1198 00:55:14,378 --> 00:55:19,378 (suspenseful music) (Paige gasps) 1199 00:55:21,500 --> 00:55:24,693 - Hey look, here's another one of these nudie pens. 1200 00:55:27,355 --> 00:55:28,188 What now? 1201 00:55:29,217 --> 00:55:32,600 - Wow, we gotta go to Mt. Penis, find that guy Lyman Weeks, 1202 00:55:32,600 --> 00:55:34,850 the only one who saw something on the ground. 1203 00:55:35,761 --> 00:55:37,678 - I think that's Pinos. 1204 00:55:39,287 --> 00:55:44,287 (car rumbling) (owl hooting) 1205 00:55:46,660 --> 00:55:51,660 (crickets chirping) (frogs croaking) 1206 00:55:54,653 --> 00:55:55,707 This is out here, huh? 1207 00:55:55,707 --> 00:55:56,957 - Oh, you're not kidding. 1208 00:55:58,000 --> 00:56:00,747 If we hadn't talked to the sheriff we'd be lost by now. 1209 00:56:01,670 --> 00:56:03,929 (suspenseful music) 1210 00:56:03,929 --> 00:56:05,410 - Mr. Weeks? 1211 00:56:05,410 --> 00:56:06,910 - [Delbert] Hello? 1212 00:56:09,964 --> 00:56:11,297 - [Paige] Hello? 1213 00:56:14,959 --> 00:56:19,959 (owl hooting) (frogs croaking) 1214 00:56:25,010 --> 00:56:25,910 - [Delbert] Hello? 1215 00:56:29,375 --> 00:56:30,208 (owl hoots) 1216 00:56:30,208 --> 00:56:31,589 Mr. Weeks? 1217 00:56:31,589 --> 00:56:34,422 (accordion music) 1218 00:56:47,550 --> 00:56:50,698 - Well, what you think o' that? 1219 00:56:50,698 --> 00:56:52,553 (frogs croaking) 1220 00:56:52,553 --> 00:56:55,560 - That was very nice, thank you. 1221 00:56:55,560 --> 00:56:59,070 - Yeah, the trills were executed beautifully. 1222 00:56:59,070 --> 00:57:00,360 Didn't you think? 1223 00:57:00,360 --> 00:57:01,730 - Absolutely, yeah. 1224 00:57:01,730 --> 00:57:02,763 - Cut the crap. 1225 00:57:04,310 --> 00:57:09,310 If you was aliens, you'd be on the ground writhin' in agony. 1226 00:57:09,470 --> 00:57:10,570 - Excuse me? 1227 00:57:10,570 --> 00:57:13,850 - Aliens can't stand accordion music. 1228 00:57:13,850 --> 00:57:15,793 It's a sound not found in nature. 1229 00:57:18,070 --> 00:57:20,983 Frequency is somethin' that drives 'em apeshit. 1230 00:57:20,983 --> 00:57:22,970 Renders 'em helpless. 1231 00:57:22,970 --> 00:57:25,790 You know, like how vampires can't stand garlic. 1232 00:57:25,790 --> 00:57:27,460 - Or crucifixes. 1233 00:57:27,460 --> 00:57:29,468 - Not foolproof. 1234 00:57:29,468 --> 00:57:31,380 I mean, got to be some vampires 1235 00:57:31,380 --> 00:57:33,560 that's Jewish or Buddhist or whatever. 1236 00:57:33,560 --> 00:57:35,103 I think on this end. 1237 00:57:36,158 --> 00:57:40,463 - Uh, Mr. Weeks, what about August 1969? 1238 00:57:41,520 --> 00:57:44,260 - Yeah, did you see the two men, the hunters? 1239 00:57:44,260 --> 00:57:45,460 - Sure as hell did. 1240 00:57:45,460 --> 00:57:47,350 I saw everything. 1241 00:57:47,350 --> 00:57:49,068 Saw 'em drive up in the truck, 1242 00:57:49,068 --> 00:57:51,393 wave a white flag at them aliens. 1243 00:57:51,393 --> 00:57:52,338 - [Paige] Yeah. 1244 00:57:52,338 --> 00:57:54,101 - Offerin' 'em cigarettes. 1245 00:57:54,101 --> 00:57:56,660 I tell ya one thing, those guys had balls. 1246 00:57:56,660 --> 00:57:59,090 No way in the world you got me down there. 1247 00:57:59,090 --> 00:58:01,490 I shit my pants when I saw that door open. 1248 00:58:01,490 --> 00:58:04,001 - Yeah, the two men? 1249 00:58:04,001 --> 00:58:04,918 - Took 'em. 1250 00:58:06,780 --> 00:58:09,339 - The movie people took 'em? 1251 00:58:09,339 --> 00:58:13,300 - (scoffs) Weren't no movie company. 1252 00:58:13,300 --> 00:58:15,180 They brought in that movie crap later 1253 00:58:15,180 --> 00:58:16,430 just to cover their tracks. 1254 00:58:16,430 --> 00:58:18,253 They all in this together. 1255 00:58:19,170 --> 00:58:20,240 - Who's they? 1256 00:58:20,240 --> 00:58:22,403 - The Universe Marketing Consortium. 1257 00:58:23,367 --> 00:58:28,367 They got operatives in every major advertising agency, 1258 00:58:28,400 --> 00:58:32,730 national publication, movie studio, TV network, 1259 00:58:32,730 --> 00:58:35,140 and they've consequently infiltrated 1260 00:58:35,140 --> 00:58:37,760 every facet of our society. 1261 00:58:37,760 --> 00:58:42,610 Insidiously prepared us for invasion, 1262 00:58:42,610 --> 00:58:45,263 conquest, and world domination. 1263 00:58:47,267 --> 00:58:49,997 - How are they gonna pull off a conspiracy 1264 00:58:49,997 --> 00:58:51,410 of this magnitude? 1265 00:58:51,410 --> 00:58:53,530 People can't keep a secret for 30 seconds, 1266 00:58:53,530 --> 00:58:56,380 let alone 30 years. 1267 00:58:56,380 --> 00:58:58,877 - You absolutely right, people can't. 1268 00:58:58,877 --> 00:59:01,350 But that's not who we dealin' with here. 1269 00:59:01,350 --> 00:59:02,950 I mean, we dealin' with people, 1270 00:59:02,950 --> 00:59:05,850 and I use the term loosely, who can listen 1271 00:59:05,850 --> 00:59:07,960 to Aretha Franklin and not be affected. 1272 00:59:07,960 --> 00:59:09,883 That's who dealin' with here. 1273 00:59:12,260 --> 00:59:15,413 Their most diabolical tool is in action right now. 1274 00:59:17,020 --> 00:59:18,343 - And what would that be? 1275 00:59:21,348 --> 00:59:22,510 - Now, I'm trustin' you 1276 00:59:23,470 --> 00:59:25,320 with some sensitive information here. 1277 00:59:27,250 --> 00:59:28,083 - Thank you. 1278 00:59:32,280 --> 00:59:33,663 - Easy listenin' music. 1279 00:59:35,110 --> 00:59:36,940 You know, like you hear in an elevator 1280 00:59:36,940 --> 00:59:39,250 or in a dentist's office. 1281 00:59:39,250 --> 00:59:41,210 - Okay, that's it. 1282 00:59:41,210 --> 00:59:42,140 We're really late. 1283 00:59:42,140 --> 00:59:43,913 Thank you very much, gotta go. 1284 00:59:49,053 --> 00:59:51,886 (engine rumbling) 1285 01:00:05,668 --> 01:00:06,501 - Oh! 1286 01:00:08,639 --> 01:00:12,123 (sighs) Where are we? 1287 01:00:13,420 --> 01:00:15,963 - Well, lost. 1288 01:00:15,963 --> 01:00:18,237 (Paige sighs) 1289 01:00:18,237 --> 01:00:20,460 (chuckles) It's a fitting end to this quest. 1290 01:00:20,460 --> 01:00:21,653 Wandering in the dark. 1291 01:00:24,367 --> 01:00:25,200 - Oh. 1292 01:00:25,200 --> 01:00:27,790 (laughs) 1293 01:00:27,790 --> 01:00:28,795 Oh boy. 1294 01:00:28,795 --> 01:00:31,795 (crickets chirping) 1295 01:00:39,990 --> 01:00:41,470 Thank you. 1296 01:00:41,470 --> 01:00:42,303 - For what? 1297 01:00:44,990 --> 01:00:46,873 - For this, the quest. 1298 01:00:47,717 --> 01:00:50,634 (Delbert chuckles) 1299 01:00:52,671 --> 01:00:53,943 - You're welcome. 1300 01:00:55,020 --> 01:00:58,219 It's been really, really weird. 1301 01:00:58,219 --> 01:00:59,052 (laughs) 1302 01:00:59,052 --> 01:01:02,433 - Yeah, creepy and weird. 1303 01:01:04,991 --> 01:01:06,980 (Paige clears throat) 1304 01:01:06,980 --> 01:01:08,880 - I think we made a good team, though. 1305 01:01:11,910 --> 01:01:13,773 - Yeah, we did. 1306 01:01:15,400 --> 01:01:16,233 Thanks. 1307 01:01:19,730 --> 01:01:21,390 Very good team. 1308 01:01:21,390 --> 01:01:24,523 Very, very good team. 1309 01:01:25,770 --> 01:01:28,703 And you've really been a gentleman. 1310 01:01:30,020 --> 01:01:31,220 Yeah, you never once tried 1311 01:01:31,220 --> 01:01:32,557 to look down my blouse or anything. 1312 01:01:32,557 --> 01:01:33,582 (laughs) 1313 01:01:33,582 --> 01:01:34,931 - You just never thought I did. 1314 01:01:34,931 --> 01:01:35,830 (laughs) 1315 01:01:35,830 --> 01:01:38,502 - Well, maybe you're not a gentleman. 1316 01:01:38,502 --> 01:01:43,502 But you're a good, kind man and that's rare. 1317 01:01:46,080 --> 01:01:48,443 - Some people would consider that being a wuss. 1318 01:01:49,559 --> 01:01:50,392 - Well not me. 1319 01:01:51,450 --> 01:01:56,423 'Cause I know good and I know kind and you're both. 1320 01:01:57,970 --> 01:02:00,193 And you have very good teeth. 1321 01:02:02,440 --> 01:02:04,603 Probably the best I've ever seen. 1322 01:02:09,280 --> 01:02:12,423 - Please don't bring up Nixon at a time like this. 1323 01:02:13,930 --> 01:02:14,967 - Nixon who? 1324 01:02:17,100 --> 01:02:20,767 (romantic orchestral music) 1325 01:03:01,435 --> 01:03:03,091 (electricity zapping) 1326 01:03:03,091 --> 01:03:04,012 - [Delbert] Huh? 1327 01:03:04,012 --> 01:03:05,762 - [Paige] What is it? 1328 01:03:07,145 --> 01:03:07,978 Oh! 1329 01:03:09,202 --> 01:03:12,611 (UFO whooshing) 1330 01:03:12,611 --> 01:03:14,824 (accordion music) 1331 01:03:14,824 --> 01:03:16,135 (electricity zapping) 1332 01:03:16,135 --> 01:03:17,573 - [Both] Lyman! 1333 01:03:17,573 --> 01:03:21,490 (suspenseful orchestral music) 1334 01:03:26,812 --> 01:03:28,479 - [Paige] Mr. Weeks! 1335 01:03:30,363 --> 01:03:31,805 - [Delbert] Lyman! 1336 01:03:31,805 --> 01:03:34,796 - [Paige] Do you see anything? 1337 01:03:34,796 --> 01:03:36,840 Oh my gosh, the place is wrecked. 1338 01:03:36,840 --> 01:03:37,740 - [Delbert] Lyman! 1339 01:03:41,270 --> 01:03:42,409 - [Paige] Try the door. 1340 01:03:42,409 --> 01:03:45,429 (ominous music) 1341 01:03:45,429 --> 01:03:50,429 (Paige cries out) (door crashes) 1342 01:03:52,283 --> 01:03:53,445 Gah! 1343 01:03:53,445 --> 01:03:56,163 (water sprinkling) 1344 01:03:56,163 --> 01:03:57,920 - [Delbert] Lyman? 1345 01:03:57,920 --> 01:03:59,043 - Is he in there? 1346 01:04:03,680 --> 01:04:04,578 Mosley! 1347 01:04:04,578 --> 01:04:08,495 (suspenseful orchestral music) 1348 01:04:09,336 --> 01:04:11,771 - Well, they disarmed his accordion. 1349 01:04:11,771 --> 01:04:12,880 (accordion clangs) 1350 01:04:12,880 --> 01:04:14,270 - Oh my God. 1351 01:04:14,270 --> 01:04:15,620 - Looks like they took him. 1352 01:04:17,364 --> 01:04:19,390 (owl hoots) 1353 01:04:19,390 --> 01:04:21,215 - I can't believe this is happening. 1354 01:04:21,215 --> 01:04:22,950 (metal clangs) (Paige screams) 1355 01:04:22,950 --> 01:04:23,783 - What the hell? 1356 01:04:29,920 --> 01:04:31,910 Universe Marketing Consortium. 1357 01:04:32,760 --> 01:04:35,319 You gotta be shitting me. 1358 01:04:35,319 --> 01:04:36,665 (electricity zapping) (dramatic music) 1359 01:04:36,665 --> 01:04:38,288 - Oh! 1360 01:04:38,288 --> 01:04:41,293 (aircraft whooshing) (suspenseful orchestral music) 1361 01:04:41,293 --> 01:04:43,068 - [Man] Hold it right there. 1362 01:04:43,068 --> 01:04:45,350 Put your hands in the air. 1363 01:04:45,350 --> 01:04:48,888 (speaking in foreign language) 1364 01:04:48,888 --> 01:04:50,404 (helicopter whirring) (siren wailing) 1365 01:04:50,404 --> 01:04:51,776 Hold it right there. 1366 01:04:51,776 --> 01:04:54,711 Put your hands in the air. 1367 01:04:54,711 --> 01:04:58,628 (speaking in foreign language) 1368 01:05:00,704 --> 01:05:01,537 - [Interviewer With Distorted Voice] How did you 1369 01:05:01,537 --> 01:05:03,701 end up with those coordinates? 1370 01:05:03,701 --> 01:05:05,453 - What coordinates? 1371 01:05:05,453 --> 01:05:06,286 - [Interviewer With Distorted Voice] The coordinates 1372 01:05:06,286 --> 01:05:07,600 where we found you. 1373 01:05:07,600 --> 01:05:09,890 - They weren't coordinates to us. 1374 01:05:09,890 --> 01:05:12,440 - Wait a minute, why do you wanna know? 1375 01:05:12,440 --> 01:05:13,560 What do you want from us? 1376 01:05:13,560 --> 01:05:16,010 Who are you goddamn guys? 1377 01:05:16,010 --> 01:05:17,601 - [Interviewer With Distorted Voice] Mr. Mosley, 1378 01:05:17,601 --> 01:05:21,518 could you show us what you have in your pocket? 1379 01:05:27,190 --> 01:05:30,037 - [Delbert] You mean this? 1380 01:05:30,037 --> 01:05:30,916 - [Interviewer With Distorted Voice] Yes. 1381 01:05:30,916 --> 01:05:33,999 Do you have anything to say about it? 1382 01:05:35,890 --> 01:05:36,773 - Not really. 1383 01:05:39,103 --> 01:05:41,936 (accordion music) 1384 01:05:52,458 --> 01:05:53,584 - [Interviewer With Distorted Voice] Okay, 1385 01:05:53,584 --> 01:05:54,417 you're free to go. 1386 01:05:54,417 --> 01:05:56,917 (door hisses) 1387 01:06:04,758 --> 01:06:06,658 - [Paige] Where do we go now? 1388 01:06:06,658 --> 01:06:07,510 - [Delbert] We'll go to my place. 1389 01:06:07,510 --> 01:06:08,460 We need to regroup. 1390 01:06:12,810 --> 01:06:14,370 - There's Mom. 1391 01:06:14,370 --> 01:06:15,793 The house on Cartwright. 1392 01:06:17,770 --> 01:06:19,093 I still have that doll. 1393 01:06:20,224 --> 01:06:22,307 (laughs) 1394 01:06:28,170 --> 01:06:30,563 Where's that picture, the Pulitzer one? 1395 01:06:33,290 --> 01:06:34,390 - I don't have a copy. 1396 01:06:48,283 --> 01:06:51,366 Go ahead, it's the only one in there. 1397 01:06:54,372 --> 01:06:57,872 (somber orchestral music) 1398 01:06:58,820 --> 01:07:00,610 - Oh my God, this one. 1399 01:07:00,610 --> 01:07:02,173 I remember this one. 1400 01:07:05,950 --> 01:07:07,223 That poor little girl. 1401 01:07:09,828 --> 01:07:12,753 (sighs) I've never been able to forget her. 1402 01:07:16,848 --> 01:07:21,192 - Neither have I. 1403 01:07:21,192 --> 01:07:24,510 (mail slot rattles) 1404 01:07:24,510 --> 01:07:25,460 Well, that's early. 1405 01:07:28,831 --> 01:07:31,581 (Delbert groans) 1406 01:07:33,978 --> 01:07:36,645 (Delbert sighs) 1407 01:07:38,370 --> 01:07:40,833 Hey, we're back in business. 1408 01:07:42,550 --> 01:07:45,383 (clearing throat) 1409 01:07:50,330 --> 01:07:51,403 - Dear Delbert? 1410 01:07:53,530 --> 01:07:54,653 - Just read. 1411 01:07:57,737 --> 01:08:00,607 - "Thank you so much for your thoughtful letter. 1412 01:08:00,607 --> 01:08:03,167 "Nobody else who bought stuff at my yard sale 1413 01:08:03,167 --> 01:08:05,527 "bothered to write a thank you card. 1414 01:08:05,527 --> 01:08:07,177 "It's good to know that politeness 1415 01:08:07,177 --> 01:08:10,527 "has not yet disappeared in this land that we love 1416 01:08:10,527 --> 01:08:13,907 "even though it's going to hell in a hand basket, 1417 01:08:13,907 --> 01:08:17,117 "just like the Roman Empire what with pornography, 1418 01:08:17,117 --> 01:08:19,773 "recycling, gun control, and everything. 1419 01:08:20,660 --> 01:08:23,127 "About the camera, I found it 1420 01:08:23,127 --> 01:08:25,677 "while spring cleaning in my attic. 1421 01:08:25,677 --> 01:08:27,407 "It had fallen between two studs 1422 01:08:27,407 --> 01:08:28,887 "and there it remained hidden 1423 01:08:28,887 --> 01:08:31,820 "until my thorough cleaning discovered it." 1424 01:08:31,820 --> 01:08:36,320 Okay, so what Bunny Wells said then could be true, 1425 01:08:36,320 --> 01:08:39,560 that if my father was, you know, 1426 01:08:39,560 --> 01:08:41,810 I mean, friendly with Anne, that's how the camera 1427 01:08:41,810 --> 01:08:43,110 could've gotten in the attic. 1428 01:08:43,110 --> 01:08:45,180 - Yeah, that could explain it. 1429 01:08:45,180 --> 01:08:47,560 Of course there are a few loose ends to tie up. 1430 01:08:47,560 --> 01:08:48,393 - Like what? 1431 01:08:48,393 --> 01:08:50,170 - Like the fact that everyone's lying. 1432 01:08:50,170 --> 01:08:52,070 - Oh come on, everyone can't be in 1433 01:08:52,070 --> 01:08:53,520 on the conspiracy can they? 1434 01:08:53,520 --> 01:08:56,740 - Oh, since when is the U.S. Postal Service this efficient? 1435 01:08:56,740 --> 01:08:58,740 And look at the return address. 1436 01:08:58,740 --> 01:09:00,628 He lives next to Joleen. 1437 01:09:00,628 --> 01:09:03,461 (engine rumbling) 1438 01:09:14,136 --> 01:09:16,636 (dog barking) 1439 01:09:18,896 --> 01:09:22,146 (knocking at the door) 1440 01:09:25,975 --> 01:09:28,558 I got a bad feeling about this. 1441 01:09:30,170 --> 01:09:31,003 Joleen! 1442 01:09:33,635 --> 01:09:34,579 Joleen! 1443 01:09:34,579 --> 01:09:37,829 (knocking at the door) 1444 01:09:39,117 --> 01:09:39,950 (handle clicks) (dramatic music) 1445 01:09:39,950 --> 01:09:42,783 (Paige cries out) 1446 01:09:43,860 --> 01:09:44,993 Jesus Christ. 1447 01:09:47,227 --> 01:09:49,894 (ominous music) 1448 01:09:58,160 --> 01:09:59,100 - Mosley? 1449 01:09:59,100 --> 01:10:00,223 How bad is it? 1450 01:10:04,068 --> 01:10:04,968 Is it really gory? 1451 01:10:08,193 --> 01:10:09,026 Mosley? 1452 01:10:09,026 --> 01:10:10,876 (dramatic music) Ah! 1453 01:10:10,876 --> 01:10:12,690 - Worse than we thought. 1454 01:10:12,690 --> 01:10:13,840 They got her accordion. 1455 01:10:15,164 --> 01:10:16,900 (accordion clangs) 1456 01:10:16,900 --> 01:10:18,300 They took her computer, too. 1457 01:10:19,665 --> 01:10:22,165 (dog barking) 1458 01:10:23,238 --> 01:10:25,240 (accordion note wheezes) 1459 01:10:25,240 --> 01:10:27,140 Come on, we're gonna get some answers. 1460 01:10:37,554 --> 01:10:38,387 (knocking at the door) 1461 01:10:38,387 --> 01:10:40,260 (dog barking) 1462 01:10:40,260 --> 01:10:41,093 Roussell! 1463 01:10:43,451 --> 01:10:45,350 (knocking at the door) 1464 01:10:45,350 --> 01:10:46,183 Haywood. 1465 01:10:49,710 --> 01:10:51,160 - Why don't you try the door? 1466 01:10:55,030 --> 01:10:56,480 - Why don't you try the door? 1467 01:11:02,830 --> 01:11:05,497 (handle clicks) 1468 01:11:09,848 --> 01:11:12,092 (door creaks) 1469 01:11:12,092 --> 01:11:14,592 (dog barking) 1470 01:11:18,060 --> 01:11:18,893 Hello? 1471 01:11:21,610 --> 01:11:22,443 Roussell? 1472 01:11:39,800 --> 01:11:43,550 - Well, doesn't seem like he's a pack rat anymore. 1473 01:11:43,550 --> 01:11:44,383 - No. 1474 01:11:49,056 --> 01:11:50,793 - What are we looking for anyway? 1475 01:11:51,960 --> 01:11:55,225 - We find it, I'll let ya know. 1476 01:11:55,225 --> 01:11:57,725 (dog barking) 1477 01:12:20,635 --> 01:12:23,135 (eerie music) 1478 01:12:29,380 --> 01:12:30,453 Paige, look at this. 1479 01:12:31,400 --> 01:12:32,680 Come here, look at this. 1480 01:12:33,708 --> 01:12:34,708 - Oh my God. 1481 01:12:36,725 --> 01:12:37,670 (sniffing) 1482 01:12:37,670 --> 01:12:38,820 Do you smell something? 1483 01:12:39,964 --> 01:12:41,250 - What? 1484 01:12:41,250 --> 01:12:43,033 - Decomposing bodies. 1485 01:12:44,940 --> 01:12:46,743 - No, it just smells like dirt to me. 1486 01:12:47,690 --> 01:12:48,523 - Okay. 1487 01:12:51,060 --> 01:12:53,843 Wait a minute, where are you going? 1488 01:12:55,707 --> 01:12:57,091 - Down. 1489 01:12:57,091 --> 01:12:57,924 - Oh God. 1490 01:12:59,732 --> 01:13:02,232 (eerie music) 1491 01:13:29,764 --> 01:13:34,091 Well, these Christmas lights certainly make me feel safer. 1492 01:13:34,091 --> 01:13:36,341 - Yeah, they do don't they? 1493 01:13:40,656 --> 01:13:43,825 (Paige cries out) 1494 01:13:43,825 --> 01:13:46,325 (eerie music) 1495 01:13:54,060 --> 01:13:57,796 - Tell me I'm not seeing what I'm seeing. 1496 01:13:57,796 --> 01:14:00,296 - I should never have inhaled. 1497 01:14:13,112 --> 01:14:17,403 - (clears throat) You, um, gonna touch it? 1498 01:14:18,910 --> 01:14:20,620 - You gotta be kidding me. 1499 01:14:20,620 --> 01:14:22,500 With my record? 1500 01:14:22,500 --> 01:14:23,340 This thing comes off its hinges, 1501 01:14:23,340 --> 01:14:24,883 it'll squash us like bugs. 1502 01:14:26,744 --> 01:14:28,720 - I don't think it has any hinges. 1503 01:14:28,720 --> 01:14:29,553 - Exactly. 1504 01:14:31,900 --> 01:14:32,948 - Okay. 1505 01:14:32,948 --> 01:14:34,031 - No, no, no. 1506 01:14:39,833 --> 01:14:41,489 (suspenseful orchestral music) 1507 01:14:41,489 --> 01:14:45,000 (electricity hums) (Paige whimpers) 1508 01:14:45,000 --> 01:14:48,081 Well, at least it didn't fall on us. 1509 01:14:48,081 --> 01:14:50,998 (electricity zaps) 1510 01:14:56,251 --> 01:14:58,257 (door thuds) 1511 01:14:58,257 --> 01:15:00,590 - We're goin' in, aren't we? 1512 01:15:01,839 --> 01:15:02,789 - We came this far. 1513 01:15:03,969 --> 01:15:05,313 - Oh God. 1514 01:15:18,550 --> 01:15:20,967 (door thuds) 1515 01:15:25,963 --> 01:15:28,740 (electricity zaps) 1516 01:15:28,740 --> 01:15:30,540 - That's what I love about people. 1517 01:15:30,540 --> 01:15:31,920 - Mm, yes. 1518 01:15:31,920 --> 01:15:33,353 They're so predictable. 1519 01:15:34,288 --> 01:15:36,705 (Don laughs) 1520 01:15:41,540 --> 01:15:42,670 - [Both] Hi. 1521 01:15:42,670 --> 01:15:43,503 - Polson? 1522 01:15:44,450 --> 01:15:45,283 Bunny? 1523 01:15:47,410 --> 01:15:48,423 You're aliens? 1524 01:15:49,590 --> 01:15:51,140 - For all intents and purposes. 1525 01:15:52,012 --> 01:15:53,670 - Klaatu barada nikto 1526 01:15:53,670 --> 01:15:55,970 - I was initiated back in '74. 1527 01:15:55,970 --> 01:15:58,480 They took about three feet of their DNA 1528 01:15:58,480 --> 01:16:02,750 and spliced it into my genetic makeup, and here I am. 1529 01:16:02,750 --> 01:16:04,750 - I was processed in '69. 1530 01:16:04,750 --> 01:16:07,870 That's the year things really started to happen. 1531 01:16:07,870 --> 01:16:08,703 - Why? 1532 01:16:08,703 --> 01:16:10,450 What happened in 1969? 1533 01:16:10,450 --> 01:16:12,170 - Once you guys set foot on the moon, 1534 01:16:12,170 --> 01:16:14,750 our leaders got a little nervous. 1535 01:16:14,750 --> 01:16:16,380 You know, in a couple hundred years 1536 01:16:16,380 --> 01:16:18,620 you'd be moving in nextdoor and, 1537 01:16:18,620 --> 01:16:21,593 well, there'd go the neighborhood. 1538 01:16:23,430 --> 01:16:24,643 - What is this place? 1539 01:16:25,940 --> 01:16:28,380 - It's wonderful, isn't it? 1540 01:16:28,380 --> 01:16:31,510 This little charmer crashed here in the late Pleistocene. 1541 01:16:31,510 --> 01:16:35,270 So it's a fixer upper, but it's got personality plus. 1542 01:16:35,270 --> 01:16:37,030 - It's a classic. 1543 01:16:37,030 --> 01:16:39,170 They really knew how to make 'em back then, didn't they? 1544 01:16:39,170 --> 01:16:40,003 - Mm. 1545 01:16:40,910 --> 01:16:42,930 It's a gem in the rough. 1546 01:16:42,930 --> 01:16:45,520 All it needs is a little TLC. 1547 01:16:45,520 --> 01:16:47,780 I've asked the Universe Marketing Consortium 1548 01:16:47,780 --> 01:16:50,320 to declare it an historical monument. 1549 01:16:50,320 --> 01:16:52,683 We've turned it into one of our branch offices. 1550 01:16:53,870 --> 01:16:56,099 - Branch offices for what? 1551 01:16:56,099 --> 01:16:56,993 - What are you doing here? 1552 01:16:56,993 --> 01:16:58,880 - What do you guys want? 1553 01:16:58,880 --> 01:17:00,803 - Fair questions, fair questions. 1554 01:17:01,880 --> 01:17:03,790 - You see, when people think of us 1555 01:17:03,790 --> 01:17:08,300 they think of crop rings and cattle mutilations 1556 01:17:08,300 --> 01:17:11,890 and abducting people and putting plumber snakes 1557 01:17:11,890 --> 01:17:14,260 up their butts, (laughs) 1558 01:17:14,260 --> 01:17:17,040 but that's not what we're about. 1559 01:17:17,040 --> 01:17:18,823 - Three P's. 1560 01:17:20,020 --> 01:17:21,270 Potential. 1561 01:17:21,270 --> 01:17:24,180 We see a lot of potential here, 1562 01:17:24,180 --> 01:17:26,363 A huge market waiting to mature. 1563 01:17:27,790 --> 01:17:29,290 Positioning. 1564 01:17:29,290 --> 01:17:33,200 We wanna be here in position when that happens. 1565 01:17:33,200 --> 01:17:35,970 And finally, product. 1566 01:17:35,970 --> 01:17:39,130 Because it doesn't matter what your product is. 1567 01:17:39,130 --> 01:17:41,650 If we've developed the consumer right, 1568 01:17:41,650 --> 01:17:43,410 they'll want everything. 1569 01:17:43,410 --> 01:17:44,820 - Products for consumers 1570 01:17:45,864 --> 01:17:48,560 and vice versa? 1571 01:17:48,560 --> 01:17:50,460 - We have the same problem that you 1572 01:17:50,460 --> 01:17:53,550 and the industrialized West have with the third world. 1573 01:17:53,550 --> 01:17:56,110 It's a huge market waiting to happen. 1574 01:17:56,110 --> 01:17:59,120 All those starving people wanting things? 1575 01:17:59,120 --> 01:18:01,690 They've got nothing you want in exchange. 1576 01:18:01,690 --> 01:18:04,010 - So you gotta help 'em progress and develop 1577 01:18:04,010 --> 01:18:06,160 'til they get to the point where you can, 1578 01:18:06,160 --> 01:18:08,370 you know, screw 'em. 1579 01:18:08,370 --> 01:18:10,810 - And that's exactly what we're doing here, 1580 01:18:10,810 --> 01:18:14,390 basic marketing research and consumer development. 1581 01:18:14,390 --> 01:18:17,220 - Oh, we've made some mistakes, right? 1582 01:18:17,220 --> 01:18:20,510 The nudie pens, Euro Disney, 1583 01:18:20,510 --> 01:18:23,500 the Ross Perot presidential campaign? 1584 01:18:23,500 --> 01:18:26,270 - But we've had some big successes, too. 1585 01:18:26,270 --> 01:18:29,340 Microsoft Windows, Rush Limbaugh. 1586 01:18:29,340 --> 01:18:30,460 - Little fatty. 1587 01:18:30,460 --> 01:18:31,293 (chuckles) 1588 01:18:31,293 --> 01:18:33,520 - CNN, Andrew Lloyd Webber. 1589 01:18:33,520 --> 01:18:35,020 - The Gap. 1590 01:18:35,020 --> 01:18:37,380 - You know Nixon was on to us. 1591 01:18:37,380 --> 01:18:39,963 He came close to shutting us down back in '72, 1592 01:18:41,149 --> 01:18:42,349 but we took care of him. 1593 01:18:46,740 --> 01:18:48,160 - What about Michael Jackson? 1594 01:18:48,160 --> 01:18:49,830 He's one of you guys isn't he? 1595 01:18:49,830 --> 01:18:52,020 - No, he's all yours. 1596 01:18:52,020 --> 01:18:53,970 - Oh, he asked a bunch of times. 1597 01:18:53,970 --> 01:18:57,020 We finally had to ask Elvis to get his daughter 1598 01:18:57,020 --> 01:18:58,930 to run interference for us. 1599 01:18:58,930 --> 01:18:59,833 So far so good. 1600 01:19:02,143 --> 01:19:03,673 - Would ya like to see some more? 1601 01:19:05,400 --> 01:19:06,760 - You want the 25 cent tour? 1602 01:19:06,760 --> 01:19:07,993 Oh come on! - Yeah. 1603 01:19:07,993 --> 01:19:11,154 - It's not every day you get to see a real flying saucer. 1604 01:19:11,154 --> 01:19:13,737 (Don chuckles) 1605 01:19:29,767 --> 01:19:31,420 (woman laughing) 1606 01:19:31,420 --> 01:19:32,863 - The woman at the house. 1607 01:19:33,810 --> 01:19:35,180 - New recruit. 1608 01:19:35,180 --> 01:19:38,570 She bought a new house, we kicked in a new life as a bonus. 1609 01:19:38,570 --> 01:19:40,720 Kind of an instant rebate, don't you think? 1610 01:19:48,450 --> 01:19:49,700 - There's Colonel Gunner. 1611 01:19:50,620 --> 01:19:52,570 He's the one I told you about. 1612 01:19:52,570 --> 01:19:54,110 How long has he been one of you? 1613 01:19:54,110 --> 01:19:55,000 - Oh he's a veteran. 1614 01:19:55,000 --> 01:19:57,090 - Yeah, got in on the ground floor. 1615 01:19:57,090 --> 01:20:00,120 He was initiated, well, during that whole 1616 01:20:00,120 --> 01:20:03,030 Roswell thing back in '47. 1617 01:20:03,030 --> 01:20:04,830 And here's the man responsible 1618 01:20:04,830 --> 01:20:06,703 for this whole little brouhaha. 1619 01:20:07,740 --> 01:20:09,730 - Roussell was in on this, too? 1620 01:20:09,730 --> 01:20:10,750 - Oh don't be silly. 1621 01:20:10,750 --> 01:20:12,250 Now you are being paranoid. 1622 01:20:12,250 --> 01:20:14,830 - Believe it or not, some things do slip through the cracks 1623 01:20:14,830 --> 01:20:17,010 and that camera was one of them. 1624 01:20:17,010 --> 01:20:18,650 We have no idea how he found it. 1625 01:20:18,650 --> 01:20:20,000 Neither does he. 1626 01:20:20,000 --> 01:20:22,510 - One man's junk is another man's treasure. 1627 01:20:22,510 --> 01:20:23,800 I liked his philosophy. 1628 01:20:23,800 --> 01:20:25,433 I wanted to have him onboard. 1629 01:20:31,650 --> 01:20:32,503 - And Donna? 1630 01:20:34,935 --> 01:20:39,140 - Mm, Donna and I were recruited at the same time in '69. 1631 01:20:39,140 --> 01:20:40,770 She's a damn good actress. 1632 01:20:40,770 --> 01:20:43,620 I always thought she was on the wrong side of the camera. 1633 01:20:50,400 --> 01:20:52,420 - Maybe my father's down here. 1634 01:20:52,420 --> 01:20:53,570 - [Bunny] Don't dawdle. 1635 01:21:04,850 --> 01:21:05,687 - There we are. 1636 01:21:14,820 --> 01:21:17,430 - And now it's time for refreshments. 1637 01:21:17,430 --> 01:21:19,332 - [Don] Oh, you're gonna love this. 1638 01:21:19,332 --> 01:21:22,999 (soft easy listening music) 1639 01:21:23,870 --> 01:21:25,250 - What is this? 1640 01:21:25,250 --> 01:21:27,383 - This is how we turn you into us. 1641 01:21:29,340 --> 01:21:31,003 - With graham crackers and milk? 1642 01:21:31,960 --> 01:21:32,920 - Yeah. 1643 01:21:32,920 --> 01:21:34,930 Well, ya feel like hell for a couple hours, 1644 01:21:34,930 --> 01:21:38,180 you lose some skin, but then you're good as new. 1645 01:21:38,180 --> 01:21:39,013 - Better. 1646 01:21:40,500 --> 01:21:42,055 - So, what are you saying? 1647 01:21:42,055 --> 01:21:45,520 We get with the program or you kill us? 1648 01:21:45,520 --> 01:21:47,680 - Oh, don't be melodramatic. 1649 01:21:47,680 --> 01:21:49,860 We are advanced lifeforms. 1650 01:21:49,860 --> 01:21:51,660 We don't just kill people. 1651 01:21:51,660 --> 01:21:53,097 Unless we wanna eat them. 1652 01:21:53,097 --> 01:21:54,763 And you look kind of stringy. 1653 01:21:56,695 --> 01:21:58,700 (aliens laugh) 1654 01:21:58,700 --> 01:22:00,100 Oh, relax. 1655 01:22:00,100 --> 01:22:01,460 Sick alien humor. 1656 01:22:01,460 --> 01:22:02,878 Lighten up. 1657 01:22:02,878 --> 01:22:03,711 - Oh come on. 1658 01:22:05,080 --> 01:22:07,700 - So, what do you intend to do with us? 1659 01:22:07,700 --> 01:22:10,410 - Are you sure you don't wanna join us? 1660 01:22:10,410 --> 01:22:11,243 - No! 1661 01:22:11,243 --> 01:22:12,076 I mean, yes. 1662 01:22:12,076 --> 01:22:13,133 No, we don't. 1663 01:22:13,133 --> 01:22:13,966 (Don grunts) 1664 01:22:13,966 --> 01:22:15,373 - Okay, you can go. 1665 01:22:19,600 --> 01:22:21,970 - Well, don't you need to hypnotize us 1666 01:22:21,970 --> 01:22:24,993 or wipe our memories clean or anything? 1667 01:22:26,600 --> 01:22:28,460 - Why would we wanna do that? 1668 01:22:29,703 --> 01:22:32,100 - So we don't talk about this? 1669 01:22:32,100 --> 01:22:34,103 - Oh, you can talk all you want. 1670 01:22:35,310 --> 01:22:37,221 - Oh, okay. 1671 01:22:37,221 --> 01:22:38,430 Well then what if we go to the media? 1672 01:22:38,430 --> 01:22:40,150 - Paige, they are the media. 1673 01:22:40,150 --> 01:22:42,670 - Products for consumers-- 1674 01:22:42,670 --> 01:22:43,503 - And vice versa. 1675 01:22:43,503 --> 01:22:44,600 Yes, I remember. 1676 01:22:44,600 --> 01:22:45,433 Thanks. 1677 01:22:45,433 --> 01:22:46,653 - Oh yeah? 1678 01:22:46,653 --> 01:22:47,486 Well, we'll do it ourselves. 1679 01:22:47,486 --> 01:22:49,260 We'll break this thing wide open. 1680 01:22:49,260 --> 01:22:51,760 We're gonna tell the whole world about you people. 1681 01:22:52,840 --> 01:22:54,040 - Well, good luck. 1682 01:22:54,040 --> 01:22:55,330 Take care. 1683 01:22:55,330 --> 01:22:57,380 Drink lots of water. 1684 01:22:57,380 --> 01:22:58,943 - Don't forget to floss. 1685 01:23:04,890 --> 01:23:07,072 - Okay, bring 'em back. 1686 01:23:07,072 --> 01:23:09,684 (Paige and Delbert grunt) 1687 01:23:09,684 --> 01:23:10,517 If you can't beat 'em, join 'em. 1688 01:23:10,517 --> 01:23:11,350 Now sit down. 1689 01:23:12,571 --> 01:23:13,890 (both grunting) 1690 01:23:13,890 --> 01:23:15,450 - Very good, Haywood. 1691 01:23:15,450 --> 01:23:17,640 Now, why don't you bring in the others. 1692 01:23:17,640 --> 01:23:19,510 - Yes, Miss Wells. 1693 01:23:19,510 --> 01:23:20,563 Anything for you. 1694 01:23:25,121 --> 01:23:26,350 - Isn't he sweet? 1695 01:23:26,350 --> 01:23:28,393 He's a big fan of my acting days. 1696 01:23:30,130 --> 01:23:30,963 - [Haywood] What's wrong with you people? 1697 01:23:30,963 --> 01:23:32,458 - Hey. 1698 01:23:32,458 --> 01:23:33,300 Hey! 1699 01:23:33,300 --> 01:23:35,188 I know you want me, you gonad. 1700 01:23:35,188 --> 01:23:36,093 - Get in there. 1701 01:23:40,980 --> 01:23:41,813 - See? 1702 01:23:41,813 --> 01:23:43,410 I told ya they wouldn't do it. 1703 01:23:43,410 --> 01:23:45,410 (laughs) 1704 01:23:45,410 --> 01:23:47,593 - It's here if you want it. 1705 01:23:48,430 --> 01:23:49,350 - They'll come around. 1706 01:23:49,350 --> 01:23:50,183 They always do. 1707 01:24:01,207 --> 01:24:04,044 (door hisses) 1708 01:24:04,044 --> 01:24:07,294 (soft classical music) 1709 01:24:14,157 --> 01:24:17,657 (Paige clears her throat) 1710 01:24:23,470 --> 01:24:25,243 - Don't even think about it. 1711 01:24:27,370 --> 01:24:28,490 - Watch out. 1712 01:24:28,490 --> 01:24:32,330 He may look like a dumb shit, but he's a mean mother. 1713 01:24:32,330 --> 01:24:35,417 Give me an Indian burn still hurt like a sum' bitch. 1714 01:24:46,640 --> 01:24:49,150 Wait a minute, what are you doin'? 1715 01:24:49,150 --> 01:24:50,750 - Mosley, what are you gonna do? 1716 01:24:53,660 --> 01:24:55,397 - If you can't beat 'em, join 'em. 1717 01:24:56,320 --> 01:24:58,810 - Oh, Mosley, don't. 1718 01:24:58,810 --> 01:25:00,760 - You'll be sorry. 1719 01:25:00,760 --> 01:25:04,310 Once they start dickin' with your DNA there's no goin' back. 1720 01:25:04,310 --> 01:25:06,070 - Chicken shit. 1721 01:25:06,070 --> 01:25:07,523 - You wanna end up with a penis curved 1722 01:25:07,523 --> 01:25:09,303 like the space-time continuum? 1723 01:25:14,114 --> 01:25:16,614 (Paige gasps) 1724 01:25:18,450 --> 01:25:21,643 - Haywood, here's to you. 1725 01:25:22,600 --> 01:25:25,743 Without you none of this would be possible. 1726 01:25:28,374 --> 01:25:29,595 (milk splashes) 1727 01:25:29,595 --> 01:25:33,820 - (laughs) Now there's a surprise move. 1728 01:25:33,820 --> 01:25:36,830 Didn't ya think I saw that comin' from a mile away? 1729 01:25:36,830 --> 01:25:38,800 I watch Matlock. 1730 01:25:38,800 --> 01:25:40,763 - I tried that once, too. 1731 01:25:42,164 --> 01:25:42,997 - Ditto. 1732 01:25:43,943 --> 01:25:44,824 - [Haywood] Well somebody's gonna have to 1733 01:25:44,824 --> 01:25:45,830 clean this milk up, 'cause-- 1734 01:25:45,830 --> 01:25:50,679 (accordion music blaring) (Haywood screams) 1735 01:25:50,679 --> 01:25:52,291 (foot thuds) (Haywood grunts) 1736 01:25:52,291 --> 01:25:53,124 (group cheers) 1737 01:25:53,124 --> 01:25:54,082 - You got him right in the gift basket. 1738 01:25:54,082 --> 01:25:55,458 All right, let's go. 1739 01:25:55,458 --> 01:25:56,357 (Haywood grunting) 1740 01:25:56,357 --> 01:25:57,274 Alien scum! 1741 01:25:58,429 --> 01:25:59,482 Come on, come on. 1742 01:25:59,482 --> 01:26:00,315 Move it! 1743 01:26:00,315 --> 01:26:02,170 (accordion music blaring) (suspenseful orchestral music) 1744 01:26:02,170 --> 01:26:04,072 - [Lyman] So long, sucker! 1745 01:26:04,072 --> 01:26:06,155 (laughs) 1746 01:26:07,422 --> 01:26:08,560 (women whimpering) 1747 01:26:08,560 --> 01:26:13,560 (accordion music blaring) (aliens screaming) 1748 01:26:19,594 --> 01:26:21,267 - No, I don't know what button it is. 1749 01:26:21,267 --> 01:26:22,100 (shouting) 1750 01:26:22,100 --> 01:26:24,075 - I don't know, I don't know. 1751 01:26:24,075 --> 01:26:25,379 - [Delbert] I don't know either. 1752 01:26:25,379 --> 01:26:26,212 The red button. 1753 01:26:26,212 --> 01:26:27,045 (door whooshing) 1754 01:26:27,045 --> 01:26:28,045 - Excuse me. 1755 01:26:28,918 --> 01:26:29,751 Excuse me. 1756 01:26:29,751 --> 01:26:30,745 - What, what? 1757 01:26:30,745 --> 01:26:31,856 - Look out! 1758 01:26:31,856 --> 01:26:34,974 (women scream) 1759 01:26:34,974 --> 01:26:36,207 (door crashes) 1760 01:26:36,207 --> 01:26:38,206 (alarm blaring) 1761 01:26:38,206 --> 01:26:39,306 - Holy shit on a biscuit. 1762 01:26:39,306 --> 01:26:40,139 Let's go. 1763 01:26:42,202 --> 01:26:43,035 Get! 1764 01:26:43,035 --> 01:26:44,917 - [Paige] Oh, come on! 1765 01:26:44,917 --> 01:26:46,469 - [Joleen] Come on, Paige, get your butt in gear. 1766 01:26:46,469 --> 01:26:47,302 - I am! 1767 01:26:47,302 --> 01:26:48,135 - [Lyman] Come on, move along! 1768 01:26:48,135 --> 01:26:48,968 - [Paige] No! 1769 01:26:48,968 --> 01:26:49,801 - [Joleen] Let's go! 1770 01:26:49,801 --> 01:26:52,134 - Come on, come on, come on. 1771 01:26:56,413 --> 01:26:57,913 - [Paige] Come on! 1772 01:26:59,149 --> 01:27:00,932 Everybody get in my car. 1773 01:27:00,932 --> 01:27:02,612 - [Joleen] You think my hair's gonna fit in there? 1774 01:27:02,612 --> 01:27:05,195 (horn honking) 1775 01:27:08,330 --> 01:27:09,314 - Get in! 1776 01:27:09,314 --> 01:27:11,320 Come on, there's no time to waste. 1777 01:27:11,320 --> 01:27:12,451 - What? 1778 01:27:12,451 --> 01:27:13,549 Are you crazy? 1779 01:27:13,549 --> 01:27:14,632 - [Emmett] Come on, don't stand there 1780 01:27:14,632 --> 01:27:16,184 arguing with me, get in. 1781 01:27:16,184 --> 01:27:18,767 - No, I think we can trust him. 1782 01:27:20,119 --> 01:27:21,194 - [Joleen] Hello? 1783 01:27:21,194 --> 01:27:22,345 You were just attacked by aliens? 1784 01:27:22,345 --> 01:27:25,043 - [Delbert] Come on, let's go! 1785 01:27:25,043 --> 01:27:27,757 - [Joleen] You people are crazy. 1786 01:27:27,757 --> 01:27:29,257 - [Emmett] Get in! 1787 01:27:31,490 --> 01:27:32,675 - [Paige] Go! 1788 01:27:32,675 --> 01:27:36,592 (suspenseful orchestral music) 1789 01:27:42,077 --> 01:27:43,110 - Ah, this great. 1790 01:27:43,110 --> 01:27:45,377 Now what are we gonna do? 1791 01:27:45,377 --> 01:27:47,285 (engine cranks) 1792 01:27:47,285 --> 01:27:52,285 Hop in, boys. 1793 01:27:57,920 --> 01:27:58,753 - Daddy? 1794 01:28:02,587 --> 01:28:03,420 - Hang on tight. 1795 01:28:04,266 --> 01:28:06,933 (tires screech) 1796 01:28:18,708 --> 01:28:19,931 There. 1797 01:28:19,931 --> 01:28:21,420 I think we lost 'em. 1798 01:28:21,420 --> 01:28:24,380 - Where the hell did they go? 1799 01:28:24,380 --> 01:28:25,642 Any vibes, fellas? 1800 01:28:25,642 --> 01:28:26,934 (electronic zapping) 1801 01:28:26,934 --> 01:28:27,767 (Paige crying) 1802 01:28:27,767 --> 01:28:30,583 - Oh, I've gotcha now, baby. 1803 01:28:33,300 --> 01:28:34,463 My baby girl. 1804 01:28:35,690 --> 01:28:36,523 I've gotcha now. 1805 01:28:38,658 --> 01:28:39,833 Oh, I missed you. 1806 01:28:42,450 --> 01:28:44,115 I missed your mom, too. 1807 01:28:44,115 --> 01:28:46,830 (Paige sobbing) 1808 01:28:46,830 --> 01:28:47,663 - Well, why? 1809 01:28:47,663 --> 01:28:49,600 Why didn't you ever come back to us? 1810 01:28:49,600 --> 01:28:50,433 - I couldn't. 1811 01:28:51,487 --> 01:28:52,410 I mean, I loved you too much. 1812 01:28:52,410 --> 01:28:54,437 It was too dangerous. 1813 01:28:54,437 --> 01:28:57,380 (uplifting orchestral music) 1814 01:28:57,380 --> 01:28:58,333 But I'm back now. 1815 01:29:00,754 --> 01:29:02,304 I'm back with my baby girl now. 1816 01:29:04,616 --> 01:29:05,449 (fist knocking) 1817 01:29:05,449 --> 01:29:06,282 - Come on. 1818 01:29:06,282 --> 01:29:08,680 Come on, you're gonna make me blow chunks outta my nose. 1819 01:29:08,680 --> 01:29:11,015 Let's get outta here before they double back. 1820 01:29:11,015 --> 01:29:11,848 Come on! 1821 01:29:13,476 --> 01:29:16,035 Come on. - They went thata way. 1822 01:29:16,035 --> 01:29:17,381 - Coast is clear. 1823 01:29:17,381 --> 01:29:18,214 Take off! 1824 01:29:19,907 --> 01:29:20,740 Go! 1825 01:29:22,200 --> 01:29:23,332 Zoom away! 1826 01:29:23,332 --> 01:29:25,319 (truck rumbling) 1827 01:29:25,319 --> 01:29:27,374 Learn how to drive, Davis, for Christ's sake! 1828 01:29:27,374 --> 01:29:28,207 - [Lyman] Come on, let's go! 1829 01:29:28,207 --> 01:29:29,040 - Let's go! 1830 01:29:29,040 --> 01:29:30,892 These are aliens! 1831 01:29:30,892 --> 01:29:32,771 (engine revs) Oh God. 1832 01:29:32,771 --> 01:29:34,938 Burn rubber, you dipstick! 1833 01:29:35,980 --> 01:29:38,410 - They were dragging Roy up the ramp, 1834 01:29:38,410 --> 01:29:40,310 but before they could get to me, 1835 01:29:40,310 --> 01:29:43,040 I shoved that old Brownie into a rabbit hole. 1836 01:29:43,040 --> 01:29:45,190 You know, hoping someone would discover it. 1837 01:29:46,320 --> 01:29:47,920 Like putting a note in a bottle. 1838 01:29:48,930 --> 01:29:50,663 I wanted you to understand what happened. 1839 01:29:52,040 --> 01:29:54,740 Roy ate the graham crackers. 1840 01:29:54,740 --> 01:29:55,573 Mine, too. 1841 01:29:55,573 --> 01:29:56,570 That's how I got away. 1842 01:29:58,000 --> 01:30:00,860 But by that time I knew too much and they wanted me. 1843 01:30:00,860 --> 01:30:02,133 Oh, they wanted me bad. 1844 01:30:03,090 --> 01:30:05,200 I could never contact you directly. 1845 01:30:05,200 --> 01:30:07,357 That's why I had Nixon come by to see you. 1846 01:30:10,110 --> 01:30:11,780 Now he's gone. 1847 01:30:11,780 --> 01:30:13,830 I've been fighting them alone ever since. 1848 01:30:16,510 --> 01:30:17,972 - There they are, up there! 1849 01:30:17,972 --> 01:30:19,903 (electronic zapping) 1850 01:30:19,903 --> 01:30:20,736 - Hey, move it! 1851 01:30:20,736 --> 01:30:23,325 We got cosmic gerbils climbin' up our ass! 1852 01:30:23,325 --> 01:30:25,310 - And they mean business! 1853 01:30:25,310 --> 01:30:26,570 - Don't worry, gentlemen. 1854 01:30:26,570 --> 01:30:28,733 We're not gonna lose 'em this time. 1855 01:30:28,733 --> 01:30:32,650 (suspenseful orchestral music) 1856 01:30:38,681 --> 01:30:41,348 (tires screech) 1857 01:30:45,783 --> 01:30:47,725 - Hey, Davis, for Christ's sake this is no time 1858 01:30:47,725 --> 01:30:49,503 to drain the weasel. 1859 01:30:52,780 --> 01:30:55,190 - Come on, let's do this as a group. 1860 01:30:55,190 --> 01:30:56,190 - Yeah! 1861 01:30:56,190 --> 01:30:58,040 We've got 'em cornered. 1862 01:30:58,040 --> 01:30:59,929 Like bugs in a rug. 1863 01:30:59,929 --> 01:31:02,820 (bugs buzzing) 1864 01:31:02,820 --> 01:31:03,763 Sorry, guys. 1865 01:31:05,297 --> 01:31:09,214 (suspenseful orchestral music) 1866 01:31:10,917 --> 01:31:11,750 (tires screech) 1867 01:31:11,750 --> 01:31:14,084 - [Emmett] And one and two and a one, two, three. 1868 01:31:14,084 --> 01:31:19,084 (accordion music) (group laughing) 1869 01:31:24,202 --> 01:31:27,202 (aliens screeching) 1870 01:31:28,437 --> 01:31:30,687 (laughing) 1871 01:31:34,836 --> 01:31:36,200 - [Joleen] Take that, baldies! 1872 01:31:36,200 --> 01:31:37,033 - Wow! 1873 01:31:41,806 --> 01:31:44,473 (siren blaring) 1874 01:31:48,294 --> 01:31:50,420 - I better radio the fire department. 1875 01:31:50,420 --> 01:31:52,033 And stop playin' that shit! 1876 01:31:54,570 --> 01:31:57,403 (explosion booms) 1877 01:31:58,956 --> 01:32:01,289 What the hell happened here? 1878 01:32:03,010 --> 01:32:04,660 - Uh, I'd be careful, officer. 1879 01:32:04,660 --> 01:32:06,033 You don't what's-- 1880 01:32:06,033 --> 01:32:09,033 (styrofoam hissing) 1881 01:32:10,620 --> 01:32:11,520 - [Lyman] Smokin'! 1882 01:32:14,700 --> 01:32:17,540 - I'm waiting for an explanation and it better be good. 1883 01:32:17,540 --> 01:32:20,350 - Huh, well, you're not gonna believe this 1884 01:32:20,350 --> 01:32:25,350 but those people chasing us, they were aliens. 1885 01:32:26,910 --> 01:32:27,743 - Uh-huh. 1886 01:32:28,680 --> 01:32:30,980 - Those space lizards tried to make us drink milk 1887 01:32:30,980 --> 01:32:32,840 and eat graham crackers. 1888 01:32:32,840 --> 01:32:35,845 - (laughs) Accordions what done 'em in. 1889 01:32:35,845 --> 01:32:36,750 (laughs) 1890 01:32:36,750 --> 01:32:39,510 - I have them strategically stockpiled in toilets 1891 01:32:39,510 --> 01:32:42,003 all over the country just in case they're needed. 1892 01:32:43,010 --> 01:32:47,757 - Now, I know why I never liked that popcorn packing crap. 1893 01:32:50,630 --> 01:32:54,803 (playful orchestral music) 1894 01:32:54,803 --> 01:32:57,202 (cash register beeping) 1895 01:32:57,202 --> 01:33:01,535 ("Mexican Radio" by Wall of Voodoo) 1896 01:33:13,501 --> 01:33:16,090 - She likes doin' the crossword puzzle. 1897 01:33:16,090 --> 01:33:17,460 What are you doin' with that rag? 1898 01:33:17,460 --> 01:33:19,200 You're embarrassing me. 1899 01:33:19,200 --> 01:33:20,163 Put it down. 1900 01:33:21,080 --> 01:33:23,180 - Inquiring minds want to know. 1901 01:33:25,577 --> 01:33:28,327 (keyboard music) 1902 01:33:30,381 --> 01:33:33,568 (electronic zapping) 1903 01:33:33,568 --> 01:33:37,901 ("Mexican Radio" by Wall of Voodoo) 1904 01:35:38,104 --> 01:35:41,771 (dramatic orchestral music) 1905 01:38:08,560 --> 01:38:11,393 (Multicom Jingle)